Public Speaking (What did I say???) | INFJ Forum

Public Speaking (What did I say???)

Discussion in 'Psychology and MBTI' started by ZenCat, Oct 6, 2008.

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  1. ZenCat

    ZenCat Waving Sage

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    I didn't know where to pose this question. Mods, please move it to a more appropriate section if you like.

    Has anyone ever had to speak publicly, made your presentation, and then had no memory whatsoever of what you've said? The Public Speaking situation I'm referring to in this instance could be of any kind: reading a report aloud to a class, debating a case with an important outcome, making a presentation to a business or interest group, standing up at a public political meeting, etc.

    From the time I was a student, then throughout my career, in local government situations (I was an officer in a local Neighborhood group, and a member of a larger area Environmental group, and attended regular public meetings for these), in a conflict situation (had a major one with a school) whenever I've had to speak to a group I experienced deep anxiety, sweaty palms, shaking, but I did it. When it wasn't a spontaneous situation, I was very well prepared with supporting info. I knew what I planned to say... but after I stood up and spoke... I never had any memory of anything I had said! EVER!

    I've been assured every single time that I spoke eloquently, unhesitatingly, coherently, intelligently even inspirationally but too softly (love when they shove that microphone closer to your face and bark "SPEAK UP!"). I have to take their word for it, because I can never recall a single word once I open my mouth.

    Could this a type thing, or is it more likely a me thing?
     
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  2. Kwistalline

    Kwistalline Permanent Fixture

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    I have this exact experience, but with a little better recollection! Getting better at confidence in front of groups-as a speaker. Still can't handle being in a random crowd of people. Speaking gives us a purpose. But yes, I have difficulty remembering what I've said.
     
  3. Quinlan

    Quinlan Right the First Time!

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    I haven't experienced that.
     
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  4. ohmermaid

    ohmermaid Community Member

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    wow. zencat, that's pretty intense xD.

    i haven't experienced that either - i forget what i've said when it's just random conversation sometimes, but not in public speaking. i actually sort of like public speaking (don't kill me, infjs!). i still get butterflies sometimes but it's kind of a fun mental challenge. of course, i hate public speaking when i'm not prepared or i'm with a group that isn't prepared...


    but! i HAVE had the "speak up!" thing before. somewhere around primary and high school, i suddenly got all super shy. :mcry: over it now though!
     
  5. Black Swan

    Black Swan Community Member

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    I think it may have something to do with you being so anxious, that you're focusing more on trying not to be freaked out instead of focusing on what you're saying, so that's why you don't remember. It's like being on autopilot and occasionally coming through. I've done that a few times. But I notice that when I speak spontaneously, I don't have the same problem. I guess there's not enough time to get freaked out and I can't be on autopilot when I don't have it written down.
     
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  6. Wyote

    Wyote Dad of the Ded
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    I only remember about half of what I say when speaking publicly, and I don't get nervous or anything. Kinda weird I guess. I think it is because I go on a kind of auto-pilot like Black Swan is saying.
     
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    #6 Wyote, Oct 7, 2008
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2008
  7. OP
    ZenCat

    ZenCat Waving Sage

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    Starting to sound like it might be a "me" thing then :mD:
     
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  8. ohmermaid

    ohmermaid Community Member

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    your avatar keeps making me want to cuddle you :mcute:
     
  9. OP
    ZenCat

    ZenCat Waving Sage

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    Thank you! I have a friend on another forum who had a dream one night about me. We went shopping, and had lunch, and talked about our dogs. But my head was my avatar head (same as this one). It freaked her out :becky:
     
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  10. ohmermaid

    ohmermaid Community Member

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    LOL!

    very, very awesome.
     
  11. Silently Honest

    Retired Staff

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    I do the same thing OP.

    *thread moved*
     
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  12. Lurker

    Lurker Has nothing to destroy
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    Yup but I have a terrible memory and often forget what I say 5 minutes after a conversation, one of the reasons I can’t lie :(

    I can relate, I've never felt it as extreme as you've suggested but some anxiety and the shakes along with not remembering despite being totally prepared are familiar.

    I did a course through Toastmasters International called Speachcraft and would highly recommend this or any involvement with them in fact (need to find a highly skilled club though as there are clubs that are significantly better than others, all comes down to the people that run them). Many people put public speaking up there with death as their greatest fear so I don't think it's a you thing but it's also probably not a type thing either, I did the course with my INFJ sister and she was always more at ease than me (she works in communications though so that may have an impact). I actually enjoy the adrenaline that comes with public speaking now as I feel more proficient, still don’t remember but as I said, that’s just me.
     
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  13. PoetOfDreams

    PoetOfDreams Shadow Queen

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    I do feel like I can't speak in front of an audience. Maybe because people says i talk weird and they start snickering (in elementary school). I would rarely talk publicly now.

    But I am gaining confidence to do so again from singing in a choir.
     
  14. tess

    tess Two

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    I usually get pretty nervous about public speaking :shocked:, less so these days though. But I find that I always go into a speech totally unsure of myself, and come out of it totally unsure of myself. I never have any idea whether I'm speaking too fast or too slow, too loud or too soft, or whether I'm getting my point across clearly.

    Usually, people seem to say I did well, they always say I spoke 'fluently' but alllways tell me I spoke way too softly. I have no ability to alter my loudness though, for some reason :frusty:.

    but when they say, 'hey that was really good!' I'm always like 'oh it was?!' once or twice people have told me that I did a terrible job etc. Once I tried to speak louder and apparently I was speaking wayy too loud, and forever since then I speak too softly :tongue1:
     
  15. v.shadow

    v.shadow Community Member

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    lol. don't worry, same thing happens to me (or maybe do worry? :meyes:). It's like an outbody experience. when I have to talk in public the words start coming out of my mouth though I have no control about it o.o and when I'm done I'm like "what did I say? were words in a logical order?" (it makes me remmember, last month I had to confront some brats in my class so I prepared some kind of speech in my mind. when I was saying it I couldn't hear a word, so when it finished I asked some friends "was it coherent?" and they all said "it was good...but you sounded kind of mad..." o.oU)
     
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    #15 v.shadow, Dec 17, 2008
    Last edited: Dec 17, 2008
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