Okay....I'm not asking how to get my ex back. No one can tell me that at all. Not even sure if I want to.....though..... anyway. Long winded as usual. I apologise.
With the realization of my personality type. (INFP) Which, as I see it, just the basic beginning of what makes up a human personality, and everyone is different.....I would very much appreciate any answers or insight anyone here can give me.
So, My ex wanted to remain friends and to not have any bad feelings towards me and stated she'll always care about me. This feels very much fortunate. That's not something that she's ever done for anyone else. I feel pretty special and am thankful! I know exactly what happened to cause the break and am actively doing what I can to Change and prove myself. However.....I I feels like I'm letting my emotions get the better of me. Still probably expecting too much too soon at this point. Patience is wearing a little thin. I can't help but feel some sort of invalidation and I know it's really just me.
So, here's some things I wonder.
I'm hyper sensitive. Sometimes I say things eluding to how I feel. When I do, it's next to impossible for me to phrase everything correctly. And pretty sure, whatever was not said by her that I think someone who cares would say isn't intentional. My ignorant ass leaves everything open and vague to give her a chance to react in the way I hope she would to show she cares. When it doesn't happen, I end up saying another thing. Then she feels like she failed when she didn't. I wasn't direct enough.
An example. I make a sculpture that represents how I feel. Then show it. She says it's cool, or interesting. I say it has meaning. She doesn't ask what the meaning is. Then I feel hurt like she doesn't care. Instead of just explaining the meaning before hand. Seems to me an INFJ may not ask what the meaning is because maybe they feel it I wanted them to know I would tell them?
How would an INFJ like me to express my feelings? How can I say what I feel about something without making her feel like I'm attacking?( I've only ever expressed being disappointed or hurt twice. Each time I was told that I was not picking.) I don't want to make anyone feel like I'm attacking. Whatever she needs I'll be accommodating completely.
I'm not so sure what I'm saying is clear. That's another problem for another day.
I just want to be able to communicate in a way an INFJ type will understand, not feel attacked. Any ideas.
I apologise for pirating in your forum. This just seems a fortuitous chance happening that I can drastically improve communication and understanding.
Thank you in advance!
With the realization of my personality type. (INFP) Which, as I see it, just the basic beginning of what makes up a human personality, and everyone is different.....I would very much appreciate any answers or insight anyone here can give me.
So, My ex wanted to remain friends and to not have any bad feelings towards me and stated she'll always care about me. This feels very much fortunate. That's not something that she's ever done for anyone else. I feel pretty special and am thankful! I know exactly what happened to cause the break and am actively doing what I can to Change and prove myself. However.....I I feels like I'm letting my emotions get the better of me. Still probably expecting too much too soon at this point. Patience is wearing a little thin. I can't help but feel some sort of invalidation and I know it's really just me.
So, here's some things I wonder.
I'm hyper sensitive. Sometimes I say things eluding to how I feel. When I do, it's next to impossible for me to phrase everything correctly. And pretty sure, whatever was not said by her that I think someone who cares would say isn't intentional. My ignorant ass leaves everything open and vague to give her a chance to react in the way I hope she would to show she cares. When it doesn't happen, I end up saying another thing. Then she feels like she failed when she didn't. I wasn't direct enough.
An example. I make a sculpture that represents how I feel. Then show it. She says it's cool, or interesting. I say it has meaning. She doesn't ask what the meaning is. Then I feel hurt like she doesn't care. Instead of just explaining the meaning before hand. Seems to me an INFJ may not ask what the meaning is because maybe they feel it I wanted them to know I would tell them?
How would an INFJ like me to express my feelings? How can I say what I feel about something without making her feel like I'm attacking?( I've only ever expressed being disappointed or hurt twice. Each time I was told that I was not picking.) I don't want to make anyone feel like I'm attacking. Whatever she needs I'll be accommodating completely.
I'm not so sure what I'm saying is clear. That's another problem for another day.
I just want to be able to communicate in a way an INFJ type will understand, not feel attacked. Any ideas.
I apologise for pirating in your forum. This just seems a fortuitous chance happening that I can drastically improve communication and understanding.
Thank you in advance!
