Not liking her posts on fb but reading all of them? | INFJ Forum

Not liking her posts on fb but reading all of them?

Artemisia

Community Member
May 20, 2014
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So it seems that this guy I have been seeing for 8 months rarely likes my FB posts but has given hints that he sees them all. I wonder why someone who generally likes other peoples' posts not like mine, especially since our relationship is long-distance. Is it some sort of introvert thing?

I should mention that in the beginning he liked a few of my posts but not most.
 
Hiding it from whom? He likes the pictures of me together with him that I have tagged and which also appear on his wall. My profile pic three months ago was with him and he liked that too. We also have no friends in common on FB so if he Likes my posts only my friends will see them.
 
Lol. Rarely does my husband like my FB posts ... and then I have an ex-boyfriend who seems to like every post. Don't try to make sense of it. I don't think it means anything.
 
Maybe, but experience with guys in the past has taught me that social media is a good way to gauge interest and whether a guy is lying or not. At least this one is not a liar and does not LIKE photos of women in bikinis all the time.
One of my exes kept liking the photos of a co-worker on my wall. When I was abroad for a few months, they hooked up. Once she realized that he was also courting other females in our group, she left him just as I had. He stopped LIKING our posts after that.
 
Back when I was on Facebook, I didn't 'like' everything that crossed my dash either. It wasn't some calculated move on my part; it just wasn't my first instinct to scroll down and do a daily sorting of 'like, like, like, skip that, like...' I'd only 'like' things when they were personal to me or if I wanted to lend my support or otherwise felt obligated, in some big or small way, to offer my thumbs up.

Or if I genuinely found something funny or touching.

But this is precisely the thing that I despise about Facebook; this culture of having to meticulously manage the content you post and the image you present knowing fully that anything you say or do will be put under the microscope. The thing is, no matter what, people are going to judge you through their own filter. Everyone, in their own minds, considers themselves an expert on reading a person or situation. No exceptions. It doesn't matter if they don't have all the facts; a good grasp on the context; an understanding of the mood or situation or even the compassion that sometimes people are *human,* these factors rarely come into play when they're looking for a pattern. And they'll always find one. This is how our brains are wired.

Now, I'm not denouncing the value of thin-slicing and I'm not denying you can get valuable information about someone from their Facebook page. What I'm saying is not to zero in on things that are too innocuous and bend their interpretation to fit a theory. This is how obsessions start; how we goof our own interpretations; how we spend hours stalking someone's Facebook page and going all CSI protracting the angle of a head tilt.

This like thing could be something, could be nothing. Rather than deciding on how to categorize it, make note of it and store it away so you can focus on the bigger, broader picture.
 
I don't like much or share much on Facebook. It's just a hassle to click buttons.
 
My SO rarely 'likes' my FB posts, or anyone else's FB posts, either.
 
FB seems to create problems that shouldn't really exist. I've just unfollowed everyone, except for a small handful of friends, plus the guy I'm seeing. I think it's natural to notice your guy's activity. I have noticed my guy's too. In fact, the stuff we post is quite different (his is almost entirely political, mine is environmental and spiritual), which makes me wonder about our compatibility (even though we share our love for wildlife)! Especially when I see him sharing his female friend's political posts and not really "liking" many of mine.

Meh. I wouldn't read too much into it. Ask him about it?
 
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Try not to get so "A Beautiful Mind" over it. That secret code you're divining may just turn out to be a room full of random newspaper clippings. Even if there were something behind it, there are far less cryptic ways to address the matter. It may be more important to spell out why it matters to you in the first place.
 
Maybe, but experience with guys in the past has taught me that social media is a good way to gauge interest and whether a guy is lying or not.

Those experiences taught you about those guys. They taught you nothing about all men.

Just as my experiences have taught me about some gals, but they taught me nothing about all women.

And the moment I think so, and apply that to a woman I have just met, I have willfully disrespected her and purposefully blindfolded myself.


Cheers,
Ian
 
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Clearly he does not like your facebook persona, and if it is anything like your persona here he may find it a bit cold and a little hubristic, which, given the reporting of your love life that you have shared with us, is clearly not the way you present in real life. You are probably warm and alluring in person.
 
Maybe you get a lot of comments from all your thirsty friends and he doesn't want the alerts.
 
Say what you will, guys, but the fact of the matter is that you can tell a lot about someone from his/her social media presence, especially if that person posts regularly. Someone who posts selfies 10 times a day, for example, is clearly a narcissist. A guy who keeps liking the photos of women in bikinis when he is married is obviously not happy in his own marriage and longing for something on the side. It is one thing to like a few bikini photos and another to like tons of bikini photos over a period of many months.

One of my friends recently had a married man suddenly like all of her FB posts and pictures. I told her "he is clearly bored with his wife and is looking for a side piece". She didn't believe me at first. Three weeks ago she told me that his wife has filed for divorce and he had sent her (my friend) a private message saying how hot her blouse made her breasts look. She immediately unfriended him as this guy was her supervisor's husband.

Of course FB can drive one crazy as some of you have said. I have also unfollowed my guy, even though we instant message sometimes.
 
Ok, I have to post this.


You live and work in some scandalous circles lady. It sounds like straight up Victorian courtship via social networking. I can't understand the appeal of having to employ that level of speculation and scrutiny when it comes to vetting a romantic interest. But I guess my perplexion is no reason not to wish you luck.
 
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Haha, Sloe Djinn. I work in academia so scandalous behavior is quite common even if society in general regards academics highly.
 
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Uhm, i am also in an ldr and has been with this guy for 3yrs now.. We aren't friends in fb because this is what exactly what we're avoiding. Being away from each other is hard enough, why would we add something that would make us doubt or misinterpret each other. (It's more of me, so i really get your point here)

I understand your side though, with just being careful and all. BUT you also don't have to think too much of it really.. How would this relationship progress when you think there's a motive behind most of his actions? Try to LEARN to trust him. I know it's easier said than done but atleast try and give chance.
:)