Middle School Daters More Likely to Dropout, Use Drugs | INFJ Forum

Middle School Daters More Likely to Dropout, Use Drugs

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by subwayrider, Mar 21, 2013.

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  1. subwayrider

    subwayrider Into the White

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    #1 subwayrider, Mar 21, 2013
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2013
  2. Apone

    Apone Permanent Fixture

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    Makes sense to me.
     
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  3. hk427f3

    hk427f3 Community Member

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    Correlation isn't causation.

    I would think that all of the things mentioned are effects, and they all stem from some common cause.
     
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  4. Apone

    Apone Permanent Fixture

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    Yes, the article mentions it's connected to risk-taking behavior.

    Also the fact that these things are pleasurable and fun, and school is boring... so yes, if you do them once and you enjoy them, you're going to want to do them again and that's going to make it harder to do the boring stuff.

    Kids are different because they don't have a proper sense of the consequences-- you can tell them what will happen, but in a lot of cases the reality of these things doesn't fully hit them until their 20s.

    And sometimes there ARE no consequences.
     
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  5. OP
    subwayrider

    subwayrider Into the White

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    Precisely. The potential mistake in the study corresponds to one of the formal logical fallacies that I forget the name of.

    It reminds me of a commercial I saw once that was horribly manipulative. It sought to get people to buy houses by stating that children who live in a house statistically get better grades. Living in a house, in and of itself, will do nothing for grades. There are other factors at play -- one of them being that children who live in houses are more likely to have educated parents and thus to have inherited and fostered the kind of intelligence useful in academia.

    Or many.

    Or maybe not.
     
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  6. sassafras

    sassafras Well-known member

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    I started dating in middle school, though I didn't have my first real kiss until 9th grade. I also didn't drop out and I didn't experiment drugs until university. However, not all of my peers were so lucky, particularly those that started experimenting sexually at a younger age. Come to think of it, nearly all of the girls who I knew had their first sexual encounter by ninth grade (and were quite public about it) hadn't finished school/dropped out of college. I don't know what it's like for the guys.

    I can't fathom the connection beyond the throw-away answer that they simply weren't ready for the psychological consequences (good and bad) of a physical/deeply involved romantic relationship at that age. Besides the complex emotions that were involved, there's social repercussions, particularly concerning society's attitudes towards sexuality.

    Especially thirteen years ago.

    These kids likely didn't have the proper emotional support; you can't talk about that sort of stuff openly with your peers, especially at that age. What kind of sounding board is a fellow eleven or twelve year old girl that is probably judging you for what you did? You can't talk to your parents about it either, for obvious reasons, and so really, it's only you and your not-quite adult brain tackling very adult emotional and psychological issues with the added, confusing burden of socially-imposed guilt and shame. On one hand, you're cool for rebelling against the 'system' and doing what you're not supposed to at that age, but on the other, you're shamed for it, especially if you're a young girl. Growing up teased and being called a slut for no reason other than preferring to play soccer with the boys in seventh and eighth grade instead of hanging out with catty girls, I can attest to how horrible middle schoolers can make you feel about yourself and your relationship with your sexuality. I can't imagine how it would feel if any of the things they were accusing you of had an element of truth. Those emotional scars would cut deep and probably disrupt healthy psychological development that may lead to drug abuse, depression, and alternative life choices.

    I don't know about the soundness of the study, but I think it's a distinct possibility.
     
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    #6 sassafras, Mar 21, 2013
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2013
  7. OP
    subwayrider

    subwayrider Into the White

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    To humor the claim:

    in my experience, getting all Romeo-esque, even at my age, makes a yo-yo out of the emotions, especially if it's a shitty relationship. It's much, much easier to focus and be consistent in things like work and school without the drama.

    On the flip-side: a supportive, healthy relationship could act as solid foundation for someone who...is prone to drama when they're on their own. For better or worse, some people need help staying out of trouble.

    The only certainty here, for me, so far: fuck public schooling.
     
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    #7 subwayrider, Mar 21, 2013
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2013
  8. hk427f3

    hk427f3 Community Member

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    I think the journalist that wrote the story is more likely to blame than the people who conducted the study. As Apone pointed out, there is a quote from one of the researchers that offers much more subtlety than the headline. In other words, more sensationalist media bullshit.
     
  9. OP
    subwayrider

    subwayrider Into the White

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    Ha! You know, I'd completely overlooked that possibility.

    Typical.
     
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  10. Billy

    Billy Contents Under Pressure
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    Middle school daters? more like Early peak-ers.
     
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  11. niffer

    niffer Well-known member

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    I don't see how this isn't a common sense observation.

    - Nerdy kids who study and don't date as much are less prone to doing other risky things and dropping out. They probably have conservative parents who have more control over their actions, either through force or through effectively ingraining their philosophies into them.
    - The more you get emotionally involved, the more you are open to the repercussions of emotional ups and downs, which will obviously affect your study habits.

    These things don't necessarily *cause* one another, because there are many factors working together. Imo the correlation was obvious though. Of course there are plenty of people who date and do well, but statistically, you just know that you're going to see at least a slight correlation there.
     
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  12. toska

    toska Community Member

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    When I was in middle school most of the kids who were dating were the ones with neglectful or abusive parents. I didn't grow up in the typical neighborhood though...
     
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  13. the

    the Si master race.
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  14. the

    the Si master race.
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    If I recall my highs school experience correctly, the people who droped out and who did drugs and got into serious relationships were the same people who were not interested in learning math for the sake of learning math, or pondering the workings of the justice system beyond "let's legalize weed". I think they just learn differently. They want to be dropped into a career and start excelling. They learn by doing. I still know many of those people and they are relatively successful.

    the article probably identifies middle school dating as the indicator because its easier to have sex than find drugs in middle school.
     
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  15. CindyLou

    CindyLou Get over it

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    Who dates in middle school?

    Who has sex by the ninth grade?

    Man, I'm getting old.
     
  16. Paladin-X

    Paladin-X Permanent Fixture

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    I did. I had my first girlfriend at 13.

    I did not have sex until much later though. :p
     
  17. Nixie

    Nixie Resurrected

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    I think it points to the early sexualization that is prevalent in our society today. While it can be argued that in the olden days women were married by the age of 12, that isn't the case today. We send a mixed message to young people today anyway. We give them access to everything since everyone "must" have a phone and internet and expect them to not become aquaited with the sex driven culture portrayed by the media. We make claims that we "protect" them with all our laws aimed at protecting children but send 13 year olds into prison for life.

    I think the sickest thing is toddlers and tieras and the like. I remember by grandmother relating the story about one of my cousins having a couple of boyfriends. She was the daughter of my aunt and she was seven at the time. In many ways we feed the culture of early sexualization and then moan and bitch about the consequences.
     
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  18. Kgal

    Kgal Magic Star Dust
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    Keep in mind this study was done in Georgia.... you know....the South....home of very conservative people who believe God will take care of everything.

    The state of Georgia has a high proportion of an oppressed population - African Americans - which means poor and uneducated. Then there's the farming communities who are also poor and uneducated. http://quickfacts.census.gov/qfd/states/13000.html

    Georgia has one of the highest teen pregnancy ratings in the country. Although it appears recently they began to get serious and address this problem.

    btw...TX is/was the highest. When George Bush and company introduced faith based family planning - teen pregnancies sky rocketed and so did abortions. You see - families seem to have problems communicating with their children when it comes to having sex and getting pregnant. Young girls used to have access to Family Planning Clinics for education and resources which went a long way to preventing having sex too early and having unwanted pregnancies. When they were shut down - because George told his constituents that the government needed to be out of "Family business" and "God" was supposed to be in there - no one thought to mention this little fact to God. (sorry - I am very jaded when it comes to George and his social services ideas).

    Anyway - in the south we saw a huge rise in teen pregnancy along with a huge rise in providing some social services for all of these babies showing up - but not knowledge and facts for the teens themselves. All of a sudden we saw teenage girls having babies because they thought it would be fun. After all - the government would pay for it - right? Wrong....

    Anyway...I could go on and on and cite studies - but the bottom line is what toska said: There is a majority of children being raised in Georgia will little common sense and guidance due to many factors that stem from the regional culture and the conservative politics.
     
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  19. Vict

    Vict mechanical and habitual agent

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    I started in sixth grade, right at the onset of puberty. It was the natural next step. 'Dating', though, is not the word I'd use to describe it. No one was dating in the traditional sense. The boys were were just trying to round the bases in their awkward way and the girls were getting used to being objectified. It went from that to instantly having a boyfriend or girlfriend.

    The rise or fall of the individual had a lot to do with their background. I made out and felt up various girls for no better reason than we were hanging out and it was the thing to do. It caught up to me in the way these things do (being called out in public for shitty behavior), I reflected, and I mellowed out. If nothing else, I was raised to think about my actions, even if it's after the fact.

    I had only one girlfriend during that middle school time and we got as far as oral sex and heavy petting. Don't know how she turned out in high school, but I graduated with decent grades, avoided drugs for the most part, and didn't knock anyone up. Success.
     
  20. acd

    acd Well-known member

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    My cousin started dating some 18 year old fuck wad drop out her freshman year... At 14.... She is now 16 and has dropped out of school this year to be "homeschooled," which means in her case, to sit on Facebook all day posting about getting high or having sex or fighting with her scum bag bf (same fuck wad as mentioned). I want to knock both of their idiot heads together. But I will say that the reason she quit school is because her parents are shit and never expected anything of her--she quit because her parents let her, not because she is dating a total douche bag or even because she was interested in dating at all.

    And she has so much potential...
     
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