[INFJ] - Melancholic or Phlegmatic? The five temperaments! | INFJ Forum

[INFJ] Melancholic or Phlegmatic? The five temperaments!

LucyJr

Well-known member
Aug 10, 2013
2,412
211
622
MBTI
INFJ
Since I first got into MBTI, INFJs rememered me of the old melancholics. So here we have a some descriptions of melancholic temperament:


Melancholic people are emotionally sensitive, perfectionistic introverts.
Perfectionistic

The defining feature of a melancholic attitude is perfectionism. They are idealists who wish for things to be a certain way, and they get distressed when they are not.

They hold themselves and others to unrealistically high standards, and get distressed when these standards are not met.
This leads to them being self-deprecating - because they do not meet their own standards - and critical of others - because those others do not meet their standards.

Their generally dour demeanour comes from their inner struggle between an imperfect world and a desire for perfection.

Many melancholics wish to learn and to understand, to know the details of every little thing, because to be ignorant is to stray from perfection. They are not content to just accept things the way that they are.
They are inquisitive and ask specific questions in order to come to a clearer understanding.

This leads many of them to be overanalytical, neurotic worriers.

They are very stubborn, because they try very hard to stick to their own carefully considered views and standards of perfection, and are not easily shifted from this path. They do not go with the flow.

They are tenacious and cannot let things go, because 'good enough' is not good enough. They strive for perfection.

They are very pessimistic, and assume the worst due to these unrealistic standards.

They think and plan before they act; they are not the types who will resort to rash, impulsive behaviour, and will panic if they are unable to plan in advance.

It's easier for them to reject and hate things than it is for them to love and embrace them. Their interests and tastes are picked carefully, and they give a lot of attention to each one, and hold them close to their hearts, rather than having many fleeting interests that change quickly and often.

They complain a lot, in a 'whinging' kind of way rather than a 'put down' or 'demanding' kind of way.

They tend to argue, because they cannot simply let things be if they seem wrong. They argue using reason, evidence, logic, and explanations, delivered analytically or with pleading. They only argue to set wrongs right, rather than to assert dominance. The argument is about the issue, not about them.

They respond poorly to compliments, often 'rebutting' them by saying that they're not so great after all.
"Wow, that's a really nice painting you just made!"
"I don't know, the eyes are probably too big..." (rather than "Thanks!")

They will blame themselves for mistakes, because they are acutely aware of their own imperfection.

They tend to prefer things to be tidy, organised in some way or another. This doesn't necessarily mean 'neat' as such; often they have very idiosyncratic organisation methods.

They are idealists, who imagine perfect fantasies and feel upset when things don't live up to these fantasies.

They prefer to tackle the heart of the matter, which can lead to them avoiding 'beating around the bush'.
Introverted

Melancholics are the most introverted of the temperaments in that they crave time alone, and are most at ease in their own company.

They can enjoy spending time with others, but this drains their energy, and they need alone time in order to recharge.

Much of their introversion comes from their perfectionism. They are picky about the sorts of people that they associate with; people who meet their standards and share their outlook. People that don't will make them uncomfortable; they do not wish to talk to 'anyone and everyone'.
Their self-deprecation also makes them think that they might not be very interesting anyway, that they aren't really worth spending time with, even if they know in the depths of their minds that they are very interesting indeed.

Once they have someone to talk to in a quiet and relaxed environment, they can talk a lot and will enjoy sharing thoughts and ideas.

They are very wary of making friends. Unlike sanguines, it can take them a very long time for them to consider someone they're familiar with a 'friend', but once they've reached this point, they will likely stick with that person loyally.

They prefer having a few close friends to many acquaintances.

They can be seen as selfish, because they prefer to be alone with their thoughts, to have their own things, rather than sharing time or possessions socially with others.
They are usually very possessive about the things that they own and are reluctant to let others borrow or use them, because they treat their own things well, care about everything deeply, and will worry that others will not look after them with the same level of care.

They could be described as 'intense', rather than 'easy-going'.
Sensitive

Melancholics are very emotional. They are moved deeply by beauty, and by distress. They are very easily hurt, because of their perfectionistic tendencies.
Often their moods are like delicate glass sculptures; built up slowly, deliberately, and carefully, but easily broken, and hard to repair once shattered.

They respond to things that they dislike with misery and with tears rather than with rage.

They are very slow to 'snap', but will hold onto emotions for a very long time. They hold grudges, because people who have failed to meet their standards, who have hurt them, will not just suddenly meet those standards without changing drastically.

They can become very 'moody', and they can be difficult to interact with because they are so easily hurt.

They are not aggressive, and wish to flee from things that cause them distress.

If they want to get back at another person, they are more likely to make them feel guilty than to insult them bluntly.

They are 'thin-skinned'.



The Melancholy is an introverted, logical, analytical, factual, private, lets-do-it-right person. Melancholies respond to others in a slow, cautious and indirect manner. Melancholies are reserved and suspicious until sure of your intentions. The Melancholy probe for the "hidden meaning" behind your words. They are timid and may appear unsure and have a serious expression. They are self-sacrificing, gifted and they tend to be a perfectionist. Melancholies are very sensitive to what others think about their work. The Melancholy is well organized; on occasion you may find a Melancholy that keeps things cluttered, however, they know what’s in the piles. The Melancholy is determined to make the right and best decision. Melancholies will ask specific questions and sometimes they will ask the same question again and again. The Melancholy needs reassurance, feedback and reasons why they should do something. They need information, time to think and a plan. The Melancholy fears taking a risk, making a wrong decision and being viewed as incompetent. Melancholies tend to have a negative attitude toward something new until they have had time to think it over. Melancholies are skeptical about most everything but they are creative and capable people. Melancholies tend to get bored with something once they get it figured out.





The Melancholic: nervous, intense, introspective, sentimental, genius prone;

Is self-conscious, easily embarrassed, timid, bashful.
Avoids talking before a group; when obliged to he finds it difficult.
Prefers to work and play alone. Good in details; careful.
Is deliberative; slow in making decisions; perhaps overcautious even in minor matters.
Is lacking in self-confidence and initiative; compliant and yielding.
Tends to detachment from environment; reserved and distant except to intimate friends.
Tends to depression; frequently moody or gloomy; very sensitive; easily hurt.
Does not form acquaintances readily; prefers narrow range of friends; tends to exclude others.
Worries over possible misfortune; crosses bridges before coming to them.
Is secretive; seclusive; shut in; not inclined to speak unless spoken to.
Is slow in movement; deliberative or perhaps indecisive; moods frequent and constant.
Is often represents himself at a disadvantage; modest and unassuming.

The melancholic person is but feebly excited by whatever acts upon him. The reaction is weak, but this feeble impression remains for a long time and by subsequent similar impressions grows stronger and at last excites the mind so vehemently that it is difficult to eradicate it. (This sounds like Ni perception to me)

Such impression may be compared to a post, which by repeated strokes is driven deeper and deeper into the ground, so that at last it is hardly possible to pull it out again. This propensity of the melancholic needs special attention. It serves as a key to solve the many riddles in his behavior.


II FUNDAMENTAL DISPOSITION OF THE MELANCHOLIC

1. Inclination to reflection. The thinking of the melancholic easily turns into reflection. The thoughts of the melancholic are far reaching. He dwells with pleasure upon the past and is preoccupied by occurrences of the long ago; he is penetrating; is not satisfied with the superficial, searches for the cause and correlation of things; seeks the laws which affect human life, the principles according to which man should act. His thoughts are of a wide range; he looks ahead into the future; ascends to the eternal. The melancholic is of an extremely soft-hearted disposition. His very thoughts arouse his own sympathy and are accompanied by a mysterious longing. Often they stir him up profoundly, particularly religious reflections or plans which he cherishes; yet he hardly permits his fierce excitement to be noticed outwardly. - again this sound like Ni coupled with Fe.

The untrained melancholic is easily given to brooding and to day-dreaming.

2. Love of retirement. The melancholic does not feel at home among a crowd for any length of time; he loves silence and solitude. Being inclined to introspection he secludes himself from the crowds, forgets his environment, and makes poor use of his senses – eyes, ears, etc. In company he is often distracted, because he is absorbed by his own thoughts. By reason of his lack of observation and his dreaming the melancholic person has many a mishap in his daily life and at his work.

3. Serious conception of life

4. Inclination to passivity. The melancholic is a passive temperament. The person possessing such a temperament, therefore, has not the vivacious, quick, progressive, active propensity, of the choleric or sanguine, but is slow, pensive, reflective. It is difficult to move him to quick action, since he has a marked inclination to passivity and inactivity. This pensive propensity of the melancholic accounts for his fear of suffering and difficulties as well as for his dread of interior exertion and self-denial.


III PECULIARITIES OF THE MELANCHOLIC

1. He is reserved. He finds it difficult to form new acquaintances and speaks little among strangers. He reveals his inmost thoughts reluctantly and only to those whom he trusts. He does not easily find the right word to express and describe his sentiments. He yearns often to express himself, because it affords him real relief, to confide the sad, depressing thoughts which burden his heart to a person who sympathizes with him. On the other hand, it requires great exertion on his part to manifest himself, and, when he does so, he goes about it so awkwardly that he does not feel satisfied and finds no rest. Such experiences tend to make the melancholic more reserved. A teacher of melancholic pupils, therefore, must he aware of these peculiarities and must take them into consideration; otherwise he will do a great deal of harm to his charges.

Confession is a great burden to the melancholic, while it is comparatively easy to the sanguine. The melancholic wants to manifest himself, but cannot; the choleric can express himself easily, but does not want to.

2. The melancholic is irresolute. On account of too many considerations and too much fear of difficulties and of the possibility that his plans or works may fail, the melancholic can hardly reach a decision. He is inclined to defer his decision. What he could do today he postpones for tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, or even for the next week. Then he forgets about it and thus it happens that what he could have done in an hour takes weeks and months. He is never finished. For many a. melancholic person it may take a long time to decide about his vocation to the religious life. The melancholic is a man of missed opportunities. While he sees that others have crossed the creek long ago, he still deliberates whether he too should and can jump over it. Because the melancholic discovers many ways by his reflection and has difficulties in deciding which one to take, he easily gives way to others, and does not stubbornly insist on his own opinion.

3. The melancholic is despondent and without courage. He is pusillanimous and timid if he is called upon to begin a new work, to execute a disagreeable task, to venture on a new undertaking. He has a strong will coupled with talent and power, but no courage. It has become proverbial therefore: "Throw the melancholic into the water and he will learn to swim." If difficulties in his undertakings are encountered by the melancholic, even if they are only very insignificant, he feels discouraged and is tempted to give up the ship, instead of conquering the obstacle and repairing the ill success by increased effort.

4. The melancholic is slow and awkward.

a) He is slow in his thinking. He feels it necessary, first of all, to consider and reconsider everything until he can form a calm and safe judgment.

b) He is slow in his speech. If he is called upon to answer quickly or to speak without preparation, or if he fears that too much depends on his answer, he becomes restless and does not find the right word and consequently often makes a false and unsatisfactory reply. This slow thinking may be the reason why the melancholic often stutters, leaves his sentences incomplete, uses wrong phrases, or searches for the right expression. He is also slow, not lazy, at his work. He works carefully and reliably, but only if he has ample time and is not pressed. He himself naturally does not believe that he is a slow worker.

5. The pride of the melancholic has its very peculiar side. He does not seek honor or recognition; on the contrary, he is loathe to appear in public and to be praised. But he is very much afraid of disgrace and humiliation. He often displays great reserve and thereby gives the impression of modesty and humility; in reality he retires only because he is afraid of being put to shame. He allows others to be preferred to him, even if they are less qualified and capable than himself for the particular work, position, or office, but at the same time he feels slighted because he is being ignored and his talents are not appreciated.

The melancholic person, if he really wishes to become perfect, must pay very close attention to these feelings of resentment and excessive sensitiveness in the face of even small humiliations.

Schubert, in his Psychology, says of the melancholic nature: "It has been the prevailing mental disposition of the most sublime poets, artists, of the most profound thinkers, the greatest inventors, legislators, and especially of those spiritual giants who at their time made known to their nations the entrance to a higher and blissful world of the Divine, to which they themselves were carried by an insatiable longing."





Descriptions of The 15 Temperament Blends

John T. Cocoris, Th.M., Psy.D



Choleric (High "D") Blends



1. Executive Pattern

Choleric-Sanguine
--------------ESTPs

"D-I"

The Executive tends to be very impatient and will often take a win/lose approach to life. They are practical and use direct methods to get quick results but still show an interest in people. They are goal and bottom line oriented and can be very persuasive in promoting their ideas. They want to be in charge because of confidence in their ability to make decisions. They have boundless energy and need activity and results or they become bored. They need daily challenge and others willing to listen to them and carry out their plans. This versatile, eager, self-starter is very competitive. To be highly motivated they need freedom, the opportunity for advancement and information that will help them get results. They like having power and authority. The Choleric fights for what they think is the right way to accomplish the goal but they can accept momentary defeat and tend not to be grudge holders. They dislike weakness.

2. Motivator Pattern

Choleric-Sanguine


"D-I"

The Motivator tends to be very impatient and will often take a win/lose approach to life. They are practical and use direct, sometimes forceful methods to get quick results but still show some interest in people. They are goal and bottom line oriented and can be very forceful in promoting their ideas. They want to be in charge because of confidence in their ability to make decisions. They have boundless energy and need activity and results or they become bored. They need daily challenge and others willing to listen to them and carry out their plans. This versatile, eager, self-starter is very competitive. To be highly motivated they need freedom, the opportunity for advancement and information that will help them get results. They like having power and authority. The Choleric fights for what they think is the right way to accomplish the goal, but they can accept momentary defeat and tend not to be grudge holders. They dislike weakness.

3. Director Pattern

Choleric-Phlegmatic
-----ESTJs

"D-S"

The Director is more determined, unemotional and individualistic than the other Cholerics. They are very practical. They will use very direct and persistent methods to get results or promote their ideas. They want to be in charge because of confidence in their ability to make decisions. They usually have deep personal goals and may pursue them at the expense of the organization. They need to know the "big picture" (clear direction) before they can function efficiently. They tend to have difficulty working with others because of their independent nature and lack of natural people-skills. To be highly motivated they need freedom, independence, the opportunity for advancement and information that will help them get quick results. They dislike weakness.

4. Strategist Pattern

Choleric-Melancholy
------I think those are classic ENTJs - cholerics with brains, because they have secondary Ni;

"D-C"

The Strategist is more detail oriented than the other Cholerics. They initiate change. They usually operate from a well-thought through plan. They have creative ideas. They will often use very direct, forceful and persistent methods to get results or promote their ideas. They want to be in charge because of confidence in their ability to make things happen the "right" way. They like to solve problems and make decisions¾and are actually quite able to do so. They usually have well thought-out goals and are very independent in an attempt to carry them out. They need to know exactly what is expected before they can function efficiently. They can be very forceful and very sensitive. They speak with authority and are usually very productive. When working on a project they exhibit sensitivity and strategy that reveals penetrating insight. To be highly motivated they need freedom, the opportunity for advancement, information that will help them get results and the chance to make something better. They dislike weakness.

Sanguine (High "I") Blends



5. Negotiator Pattern

Sanguine-Choleric

"I-D"

The Negotiator is more assertive than the other Sanguines. They easily manipulate others. They are very energetic and work well with and through people. This person has an outgoing interest in others and the ability to gain the respect and confidence of varied types of individuals. They strive to do business in a friendly way while pushing forward to win objectives and sell their point of view. They are able to coordinate events and the are willing to delegate responsibilities. They exhibit poise and confidence in most situations, especially social events. They will become bored without activity and social involvement. They have a difficult time with details, organization and consistency. They prefer others to give them information that will help them make decisions rather than research it themselves. They work very well with others and make good leaders. They are very optimistic but lack follow through. To be highly motivated they need freedom of expression, recognition, involvement with people, acceptance and freedom from details.

6. Marketer Pattern

Sanguine-Choleric


"I-D"

The Marketer is more enthusiastic than the other Sanguines. They get very excited. This is an assertive and energetic persons who works well with and through people. They have an outgoing interest in others and the ability to gain the respect and confidence of varied types of individuals. They strive to do business in a friendly way while pushing forward to win their objectives and sell their point of view. They easily promote their own ideas or the ideas of others. They exhibit poise and confidence in most situations, especially social events. They will become bored without activity and social involvement. They have difficulty with awareness of time, organization and concentrating on details. They prefer others to give them information that will help them make decisions rather than research it themselves. They are very optimistic and enthusiastic but lack consistent follow-through. To be highly motivated they need freedom of expression, mobility, involvement with people, recognition, acceptance and freedom from details.

7. Relater Pattern

Sanguine-Phlegmatic


"I-S"

The Relater is more relationship oriented than the other Sanguines. They are very approachable and place high importance on enduring relationships. This person impresses most people with their warmth, empathy and understanding approach. They possess a casual kind of poise in social situations. People tend to seek them out to share their problems because they perceive them to be a good listener. Children especially like them. Although doing details and organizational things give them difficulty, they are able to do them. They work very well with others. They are optimistic and accommodating. To be highly motivated they need freedom of expression, the opportunity to build relationships and to be of service to others.

8. Performer Pattern

Sanguine-Melancholy
----------those sounds like ENFJs to me;

"I-C"

The Performer is more formal than the other Sanguines. They are very concerned about making a favorable impression and being accepted by others. They tend to be very image conscious and tend to actively seek recognition for their achievements. They are usually well organized but may not be consistent or follow-through. Information about their job is very important to them so they may ask many questions. They function best when they have a detailed plan. To be highly motivated they need security, freedom of expression, relationships with people and the opportunity to be creative. They also need information, time to think and a plan before they can function effectively. They may be reluctant to take action until they have confidence that they will not fail¾if they cannot be sure, they often do not try.

Phlegmatic (High "S") Blends

9. Inspector Pattern

Phlegmatic-Choleric
----------ISTPs
"S-D"

The Inspector is more industrious, determined and unemotional than the other Phlegmatics. This persistent individual brings a deceptively intense approach to the task. Being low-key outwardly, their involvement in a task is not easily observed. They are a dispassionate "anchor of reality." They are calm, steady and persevering. They are successful because of dogged determination. After starting a project they are tenacious and will fight hard for their objectives. They are very independent, questioning and thorough in their approach and will follow through. They want to operate by themselves and set their own pace. Once their mind is made up they will resist any other method of approach¾they can be very stubborn! They seek challenging assignments without close supervision. They prefer work of a technical nature rather than involvement with people.

10. Harmonizer Pattern

Phlegmatic-Sanguine


"S-I"

The Harmonizer is more friendly than the other Phlegmatics. They are very accepting and tolerant of others. This person is very accommodating and easy to be associated with in the work environment and as a friend. They need some social involvement. They are loyal, consistent and dependable. They will often work when they are ill. They are very independent minded and want to operate by themselves and set their own pace. They learn by doing. Once their mind is made up they will resist any other method of approach. They can do routine work but will need some activity during the day. They have a very difficult time saying no and will often take on more than they can do. They have a very pleasant, soft voice.

11. Helper Pattern

Phlegmatic-Melancholy

"S-C"

The Helper is more consistent than the other Phlegmatics. They are very routine, accommodating and passive. Patience, control and deliberateness characterize the usual behavior of this amiable and easy going individual. This determined and persistent individual brings a deceptively intense approach to the task. Being low-key, their involvement in a task is not easily observed. They are calm, steady and persevering. They are successful because of persistence. After starting a project they will usually see it through to completion. They are independent, questioning and thorough in their approach and will follow through. They want to operate by themselves and set their own pace. They are very possessive of family, material things and friends. Once their mind is made up they will resist any other method of approach. They prefer work of a technical nature and involvement with a limited number of people. They approach a task with calculated moderation. They are always willing to help those they consider to be their friend.

Melancholy (High "C") Blends

12. Trainer Pattern

Melancholy-Choleric
-------------probably INTJs and ISTJs
"C-D"

The Trainer is more forceful than the other Melancholies. They are systematic, precise thinkers and follow procedures in both their business and personal life. They are attentive to detail and push to have things done correctly, according to their own predetermined standards. They are sensitive and conscientious. They normally behave in a diplomatic manner except when it comes to deviating from standards they have accepted. They can then be very forceful in insisting the right way be followed. They are not socially active, preferring work and privacy to people. They tend to have difficulty in relationships because they are not flexible and they can be abrasive when communicating with others. They make decisions slowly because of collecting and analyzing information until they are sure of the best course of action. To be highly motivated they need a structured environment with clear rules and procedures, time to organize, collect information, think and the freedom to develop a plan.

13. Idealist Pattern

Melancholy-Phlegmatic-Choleric


"C-S-D"

The Idealist is unique because the Choleric temperament has strong influence on their behavior. The combination of Melancholy-Phlegmatic-Choleric urges this person to "push" their ideal standards to perfection.

The Idealist is a systematic, precise thinker and will follow procedures in both their business and personal life. They are attentive to detail and push to have things done correctly, according to predetermined standards (usually their own). They are conscientious in work requiring accuracy and maintaining high, sometimes unrealistic, standards. They normally behave in a diplomatic manner except when it comes to deviating from standards they have accepted. They can then be very forceful in insisting the "right way" be followed. They are not socially active, preferring privacy. They tend to have difficulty in relationships because they are rigid and maintain high standards. They make decisions slowly because of collecting and analyzing information until they are sure of the best course of action. To be highly motivated they need a structured environment with clear rules and procedures, time to organize, collect information, think and the freedom to develop a plan.

14. Diplomat Pattern

Melancholy-Sanguine

"C-I"

The Diplomat is more friendly than the other Melancholy blends. They have high personal ambitions. This is a well-balanced systematic, precise thinker and worker who tends to follow procedures in both their business and personal life. They are attentive to detail and friendly. They like to do things correctly, according to predetermined standards. They are extremely conscientious. They need some mobility, rather then sitting for long periods of time. This is a versatile, productive individual that works well with most everyone. At times they can be sensitive, especially to criticism. They make decisions slowly because of collecting and analyzing information until they are sure of the best course of action (this is especially true when involved in a new project). To be highly motivated they need a structured environment with clear rules and procedures, time to organize, collect information, think and time to develop a plan and have some social interaction.

15. Analyst Pattern

Melancholy-Phlegmatic


"C-S"

The Analyst is more conscientious and private than the other Melancholy blends. They withdraw from aggressive people. This quite individual works well in a structured environment requiring attention to detail. They are a systematic, precise thinker and worker who tends to follow procedures in both their business and personal life. They make decisions slowly because of collecting and analyzing information until they are sure of the right and best course of action (this is especially true when involved in a new project). They are good at anticipating problems but not good at taking action. They are usually very well organized and function best when they have a well-through out plan. To be highly motivated they need a structured environment with clear rules and procedures, time to organize, collect information, think and the time to develop a plan.
 
Err....many many words. Words and more words....
 
What's a phlegmatic?
 
I always considered myself to have a melancholy disposition, but I've never read such detailed descriptions of the temperaments. I'm surprised by how ridiculously accurate it is for me.

There are definite parallels with INFJs. The perfectionism described is the result of Ni.

People always say I'm a pessimist, a cynic. I'm always trying to tell them that, really, I'm an idealist; I'm just jaded because reality falls short of my ideals. People consistently hold themselves to much lower standards than I think they should. Having an uncompromising devotion to my ideals, naturally, this makes me depressed.

hmm...are pessimism/optimism linked to MBTI? Even on this forum you can see a wide range of pessimists, optimists and idealist! Interesting!
 
I may be perfectionistic, sensitive and introverted but I'm not melancholic.

This is not me, I have courage:

The melancholic is despondent and without courage. He is pusillanimous and timid if he is called upon to begin a new work, to execute a disagreeable task, to venture on a new undertaking. He has a strong will coupled with talent and power, but no courage. It has become proverbial therefore: "Throw the melancholic into the water and he will learn to swim." If difficulties in his undertakings are encountered by the melancholic, even if they are only very insignificant, he feels discouraged and is tempted to give up the ship, instead of conquering the obstacle and repairing the ill success by increased effort.
 
[MENTION=10252]say what[/MENTION]

the Phlegmatic is usually what one might call the 'strong silent type'; the pure Phlegmatic in MBTI would be a classic ISTP or sometimes ISTJ, but a ISTJ would be a Phelgmatic-Melancholic, because he has melancholic tendencies;also ISFJ is a good Phelgmatic; a ESTP is a Choleric-Phelgmatic temperament;

Phlegmatic Temperament

The Easy Going Phlegmatic


The phlegmatic personality is low-key, easygoing and relaxed. They are patient, well-balanced and calm. They usually have a consistent and well-balanced lifestyle. While they are quiet, they are also possess a witty sense of humor. They are sympathetic and kindhearted. They are content in almost any surrounding or circumstance and go with the flow of life. They have a calming disposition in times of trouble. They are not open about their emotions and are not quick to express their true feelings -- mainly because they do not want to hurt another's feelings. They do not like feeling vulnerable by exposing their own thoughts without trusting first.

The phlegmatic will take time for others and is not hurried. They are very patient with children and make wonderful parents. They can take the good with the bad and do not easily become upset. They are competent, steady, peaceful and agreeable. They oftentimes possess excellent administrative ability. They are natural born mediators and work well under pressure.

In a group setting, they are easy to get along with. They are excellent listeners with a dry sense of humor. They enjoy watching people and oftentimes have many friends. People are naturally drawn to them because of their accepting, easygoing nature. All-in-all, every group and every family would benefit from the stabilizing force of at least one phlegmatic!

If you have two phlegmatics in a house that caught fire they would each wait it out to see who gets off the couch first to call the fire department! If you have two phlegmatics on a working committee with a deadline approaching they would have difficulty deciding what needs to be done and both would avoid discussing the matter hoping it will go away. A phlegmatic group needs the leadership of a strong choleric or a fussy melancholy. A phlegmatic person is the only type of personality that will tolerate these strong temperaments anyway. (The good thing is we are all a blend of temperaments to balance us all out!)

A phlegmatic temperament, in spite of the many wonderful characteristics can have its downside, like every temperament. They can be unenthusiastic and do not get revved up very easily. That can be very frustrating to the fireball, changeable sanguine temperament -- even though the balance of the phlegmatic is is exactly what a sanguine temperament needs.

A phlegmatic can become addicted to worry. They need assurance. They can be resistant to change and that can make them indecisive and insecure in decisionmaking. They need a lot of encouragement, even though they appear secure and confident. Remember that they do not openly express their fears or their feelings. Be sensitive with a phlegmatic. Be as kind and considerate to them as they will be to you.

Depending on how strong the phlegmatic tendencies are, they will avoid taking on any more responsibility than needed. Again, they need to be encouraged to take on responsibility because they are very capable. Encourage and praise them.

Do not be totally fooled by their easygoing nature. They can possess a quiet will of iron that is as immovable as a rock. They can be very stubborn and never admit it. They can be self-righteous and a little selfish at times. They will try to place decision making responsibilities onto others. They can be judgmental, sarcastic, and teasing.

They have difficulty setting goals and can lack self-motivation. They can be difficult to get moving and they deeply resent being pushed. They would much rather watch than be the active participant.

If you are blessed with a phlegmatic child, realize that they need direct and positive motivation. Do not expect them to respond in immediate enthusiasm. It is not part of their nature. Instead of pushing or judging, help them set goals and provide them with benchmark rewards.

While you may need to force a phlegmatic person to make a decision out of necessity, do not push them to make a decision and then blame them if it does not work out. This is very detrimental to a phlegmatic's self-esteem. They have a sensitive ego, but they will never let you see that you have hurt it. Remember that their quiet easygoing temperament makes them easy targets. Be careful not to take advantage of them.

In conflict, do not accept their first "no", but continue to show them the confidence you have in their ability to lead or make sound decisions once motivated. Give them time and a little space to adjust to new changes and provide them with information and encouragement to help them sort through decisions. Appreciate their kind and even disposition. Appreciate that they will not make hasty decisions and have excellent, well-balanced problem solving abilities.

Treat a phlegmatic individual very, very nice. They are a gift. As a matter of fact, every individual is a unique and special gift! As in all temperaments, be accepting of differences and appreciate our unique individualities. Learn to accept the good with the bad in oneself as well as in others. Lighten up on yourself as well as on others. Life is short and relationships are a major and necessary part of a richness in life.



To the observer, the Phlegmatic’s are extremely slow-paced and stubborn. The Phlegmatic goes through life doing as little as possible, quietly, and expending little energy. It is not clear whether the Phlegmatic has very little energy, or it is because they refuse to use what little energy they do have. They are task oriented with a great capacity for work that requires precision and accuracy and expends a minimal amount of energy. Only sleep can regenerate a Phlegmatic in Inclusion.

The world may never know all the brilliant thoughts, great books, spectacular works of art, or wonderful ministries that have been buried with the Phlegmatic. They seldom, if ever, use these ideas and talents because it would require expending to much energy and effort, to put these ideas into action. The Phlegmatic sits back and watches other temperaments busy doing things wrongly and looking at all the things in te world that need to be changed. Identifying the injustice is not difficult for the Phlegmatic in Inclusion; however, they will seldom, if ever, initiate action against injustice. They will try to inspire others to do something, but are not likely to personally get involved themselves.

The Phlegmatic is the only temperament the Choleric is unable to control (which frustrates the Choleric tremendously). The Phlegmatic is the most stable temperament. The Phlegmatic is the most stubborn of all the temperaments when it comes to making changes. Because of their tendency to uninvolvement, they are natural negotiators and diplomats. “Peace at all costs” is their motto. The Phlegmatic has no fear of rejection and can handle unaffectionate and hostile people. They are calm, easygoing people who are not plagued with the emotional outbursts, exaggerated feelings, anger, bitterness or unforgiveness as are other temperaments. They are observers who do not get involved nor expend much energy. Their cool, complacent attitude an hurt people that love them. The way they observe can cause them to never to give of themselves and, therefore, never receive either.

Inclusion Strengths of The Phlegmatic: The ability to perform tedious tasks, relate to both tasks and people, calm easygoing, extremely efficient and perfectionistic. The Phlegmatic in Inclusion can function quite well in a hostile social setting. Nothing “ruffles their feathers.”

Inclusion Weaknesses of The Phlegmatic: Unwillingness to become involved, tendency to be an observer rather than a participant, and use of a verbal defense that often hurts others.

Control Strengths of The Phlegmatic: The tendency to be very practical, conservative, peace-loving and a good peace maker / arbitrator.

Control Weaknesses of The Phlegmatic: Indecisiveness, the tendency to procrastinate, and being very difficult to motivate. They use verbal defenses that often hurt others; it is used against anyone who tries to motivate or control them, particularly Cholerics.

Affection Strengths of The Phlegmatic: Well balanced, easygoing, non-demanding, calm and realistic in demands for love and affection.

Affection Weaknesses of The Phlegmatic: Unwillingness to become involved in deep relationships, tendency to be an observer only, rarely self-sacrificing, unemotional and inexpressive. Verbal defenses are used to protect low energy supply with regard to physical and sexual involvement.
 
  • Like
Reactions: say what
I may be perfectionistic, sensitive and introverted but I'm not melancholic.

This is not me, I have courage:
Yes, you're just like me in this aspect.
The Melancholics Temperament fits me well, but I never been fearful or with a lack of courage.
But nobody is of a pure disposition, I think INFJs are Melancholic-Phelgmatic in most cases;
 
hmm...are pessimism/optimism linked to MBTI? Even on this forum you can see a wide range of pessimists, optimists and idealist! Interesting!
No, I don't think so.
Even, let's say, a type is inclined more to pessimism, the person could change this inclination to optimism.
 
LOL, you gave an accurate answer in one sentence and it took me like two paragraphs.

I think the lack of courage thing applies to me... But I don't think it's because of INFJ-ness, I think it has more to do with how life experiences affected my attitude.
I found another good description of the melancholic temperament. Check this out:

“MELANCHOLY” TEMPERAMENT
1.The richest of all temperaments.

2.Analytical, self-sacrificing, gifted, a
perfectionist.

3.He has a sensitive emotional nature.
4.He enjoys the fine arts.

5.He is usually an introvert, given to moods,
and varies in his moods.

6. When he is up, he seems to be an extrove
rt.
7. When he is down, he seems to be an
introvert, depressed, withdrawn, and can
even be antagonistic.


8. He is a faithful friend, but makes friends
slowly.

9. He does not usually go to people, but lets
them come to him.

10. He is the most dependable of all
temperaments.

11 .He likes others, has a strong desire to be
loved,but doesn’t push himself on others.

12. He finds it hard to take people at face v
aluebecause of past experiences.

13.He is good at analyzing and diagnosing
problems.

14. He is slow in pushing projects because he can
see too man problems.

15. When he is on an emotional high, he may produc
e a work of art or genius.

16. He finds his greatest meaning in sacrificing,
choosing a vocation that is demanding and
sacrificing.

What I bolded there...that sounds like INFJs who might appear extrovert descriptions!
 
Ok, this description is pretty spot-on for me. I just don't think the word 'melancholic' fits very well (phlegmatic even worse) because it sounds like your depressed all the time.
 
I think enneagram does come into play here. I think an enneagram 4 is going to be most like the melancholic. I believe I'm a 9w1 and feel I have both melancholic and phlegmatic tendencies.
 
In fact, I think I find it hard to form an identity around either one. While the melancholy descriptions sounds like me, I wouldn't be apt to identify with it in its entirety. I think this is part of a nine not being able to form an identity as easily.
 
In fact, I think I find it hard to form an identity around either one. While the melancholy descriptions sounds like me, I wouldn't be apt to identify with it in its entirety. I think this is part of a nine not being able to form an identity as easily.

I think you're right about the 9. I think I'm very chameleon-like, shifting to suit the situation to try to keep everything on an even keel. I can be melancholic when I'm alone but being like that with others around stirs up too much trouble. Also, I don't want to make anybody feel bad so I appear like everything is always ok so nobody has to worry about me (and then I'm sad that nobody worries about me, silly I know).
 
Ok, this description is pretty spot-on for me. I just don't think the word 'melancholic' fits very well (phlegmatic even worse) because it sounds like your depressed all the time.
Yep, that's one bad thing about it.
But melancholy has two senses, two meanings: one is depression or black mod, while the other one is contempation or meditation, which means a tendency of the melancholic person to contempate, to be reflective on the meaning of things.
So when one is saying, 'I'm being melancholic now', it means 'I'm contemplative or reflective now' :D
 
I think you're right about the 9. I think I'm very chameleon-like, shifting to suit the situation to try to keep everything on an even keel. I can be melancholic when I'm alone but being like that with others around stirs up too much trouble. Also, I don't want to make anybody feel bad so I appear like everything is always ok so nobody has to worry about me (and then I'm sad that nobody worries about me, silly I know).

That's describes me fairly well. I don't like sharing my melancholy with others directly. The more around others I am, the less melancholic I appear, but I am much more melancholic when I am alone. When alone I am often very reflective and contemplative.
 
I can see myself through the melancholic temperament, some points are an incredibly accurate description of my daily struggles. Being a 4 in the enneagram also haves to do with it i believe.
 
6. When he is up, he seems to be an extrovert.
7. When he is down, he seems to be an
introvert, depressed, withdrawn, and can
even be antagonistic.


What I bolded there...that sounds like INFJs who might appear extrovert descriptions!

Really? That sounds like 90% of the people I've ever known.
 
Really? That sounds like 90% of the people I've ever known.
What the description is trying to say is that melancholic is acually a introvert, yet when he is in a good moon, they may appear as extroverts.

Because it wouldn't have any sense to say that when they are in a good mood, they act like extroverts, because they really are, while when they are in a bad mood, they behave like introverts, while they actually aren't introverts.
 
What the description is trying to say is that melancholic is acually a introvert, yet when he is in a good moon, they may appear as extroverts.

Because it wouldn't have any sense to say that when they are in a good mood, they act like extroverts, because they really are, while when they are in a bad mood, they behave like introverts, while they actually aren't introverts.

That statement makes plenty of sense to me. Maybe you're thinking about this too hard.
 
That statement makes plenty of sense to me. Maybe you're thinking about this too hard.

Can you exactly explain what you are trying to say here? I feel like I'm loosing my time with your ambiguities! So make your point clear!

At what am I thinking too hard?

What is the statement you're talking about?

Really? That sounds like 90% of the people I've ever known.
What is this exactly mean in the context of the melancholic temperament?