LuLu - Review the Guys You Date | INFJ Forum

LuLu - Review the Guys You Date

jimtaylor

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May 19, 2010
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http://www.refinery29.com/2013/12/59814/lulu-app
I am not going to give a background on the app, you can read that by following the above link…. What do you think of the app? Evil? Awesome? Somewhere in-between?

I was talking with a female friend when she mentioned the app, knowing full well I would be too curious not to sign up. I am like a child that way, you tell me not to look in the bag and I am going to want to look in the bag. Anyway, I can see how some would be absolutely insulted by this app because it depends on personal opinion and people’s egos are so easily offended.

I don’t find it offending at all. If I treat a girl like crap and she puts a crappy review of me out there than I sure as hell deserved it. It is interesting though and has room for plenty of abuse. Scorned and jealous lovers, etc… However, my counter to this is that if a girl is going to completely base her decision on whether or not to go on a date with a guy based on an app (that I might add has purposely been marketed at this point to a certain college demographic) then she probably isn't the girl for me.
 
When did people become products that you can review? I think this is terrible...way to dehumanize the dating experience.
 
When did people become products that you can review? I think this is terrible...way to dehumanize the dating experience.

It is the way society likes to role now. We like to assign classifications to people like INFJ, 8/10, nerd, gay. Not trying to be facetious here but humans naturally review and compare all the time. Who can honestly say that they have gone on a date and not compared the guy/gal they are dating to a fictional character/ex lover/high school crush etc… Same thing? No and yes. The biggest difference is the wide availability and visibility of it in this form.


EDIT: It is very sad but look at everything else we do that basically does the same thing. Tinder, Who is Hot Who is Not, online dating, Facebook, Snap Chat, Instagram.... We are all addicted to instant feedback, good or bad. The entire human experience has been dehumanized.

Why do people do online dating? It's easier. Not meaning it's easier to hook-up or things like that but the rejection is less real. I had to learn this for myself. The art of walking up to a girl and introducing yourself and taking the risk of being a complete fool is dying. Being relegated to a website or bars. The gray area is disappearing with more and more people gravitating to the extremes. Everyone is afraid that if they walk up to a girl and try to strike a conversation, they are invading her personal space or being a burden.

The sad reality is that the human experience is already so dehumanized that this is the norm. This is to be expected and is unsurprising.
 
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Gonna review the hell out of others then.


1 out of 5 for using stupid app.
 
I think it should be illegal. Potentially defamation lawsuits abound. Im suprised they have not been sued and shut down yet.
 
It is the way society likes to role now. We like to assign classifications to people like INFJ, 8/10, nerd, gay. Not trying to be facetious here but humans naturally review and compare all the time. Who can honestly say that they have gone on a date and not compared the guy/gal they are dating to a fictional character/ex lover/high school crush etc… Same thing? No and yes. The biggest difference is the wide availability and visibility of it in this form.


EDIT: It is very sad but look at everything else we do that basically does the same thing. Tinder, Who is Hot Who is Not, online dating, Facebook, Snap Chat, Instagram.... We are all addicted to instant feedback, good or bad. The entire human experience has been dehumanized.

Why do people do online dating? It's easier. Not meaning it's easier to hook-up or things like that but the rejection is less real. I had to learn this for myself. The art of walking up to a girl and introducing yourself and taking the risk of being a complete fool is dying. Being relegated to a website or bars. The gray area is disappearing with more and more people gravitating to the extremes. Everyone is afraid that if they walk up to a girl and try to strike a conversation, they are invading her personal space or being a burden.

The sad reality is that the human experience is already so dehumanized that this is the norm. This is to be expected and is unsurprising.

The difference is that Tinder and other online dating sites do not offer opinions or judgements about people, they just offer a window and a door to another person.

When did people become products that you can review? I think this is terrible...way to dehumanize the dating experience.

I agree wholeheartedly, and I could not see myself going on a date based partly or wholly on a review. Ratings are an unforgiving practice that do not account for so many of the factors which influence behaviour and interactions. And what right does a person who has dated me a few times have to offer opinions to other people about who I am and what I am like? I like to treat my dating life very privately, and this would be a significant invasion of my privacy.
 
I don’t find it offending at all. If I treat a girl like crap and she puts a crappy review of me out there than I sure as hell deserved it.

Your opinion is based on the assumption that people aren't fucked-up, aren't judgmental, aren't ridiculous, and tell the truth.
 
It is the way society likes to role now. We like to assign classifications to people like INFJ, 8/10, nerd, gay. Not trying to be facetious here but humans naturally review and compare all the time. Who can honestly say that they have gone on a date and not compared the guy/gal they are dating to a fictional character/ex lover/high school crush etc… Same thing? No and yes. The biggest difference is the wide availability and visibility of it in this form.


EDIT: It is very sad but look at everything else we do that basically does the same thing. Tinder, Who is Hot Who is Not, online dating, Facebook, Snap Chat, Instagram.... We are all addicted to instant feedback, good or bad. The entire human experience has been dehumanized.

Why do people do online dating? It's easier. Not meaning it's easier to hook-up or things like that but the rejection is less real. I had to learn this for myself. The art of walking up to a girl and introducing yourself and taking the risk of being a complete fool is dying. Being relegated to a website or bars. The gray area is disappearing with more and more people gravitating to the extremes. Everyone is afraid that if they walk up to a girl and try to strike a conversation, they are invading her personal space or being a burden.

The sad reality is that the human experience is already so dehumanized that this is the norm. This is to be expected and is unsurprising.

This is not the same as internally comparing/evaluating a person that you meet. Firstly, you've MET the person - not decided to meet or not meet a person based on someone else's 'review' of their own experience. Secondly, how do you know the reviews are accurate? What is a guy rejects a girl because she's crazy. Then that crazy girl goes on here and writes a crazy review? Then that guy is peg based on a false perception? Lastly, what does this mean for a man that keeps getting glowing responses? This is like a players paradise.

Dating isn't about pleasing another person- it's about finding a compatible match. Online dating, Tinder, and apps like these is what makes dating so terrible now. People have an idea of perfection and what they want, and miss opportunities for meeting people who might change their expectations.
 
I find the main problem is that it can be used abusively against/toward others. Not only do I think about a lot of guys becoming victims of women hating and plotting revenge against them by posting negative, demeaning reviews... but I can also see it going extremely overboard. Like, what if some women use it as revenge and also badmouth the new gf/wife of the guys as well? There are too many issues involved with this app.

It takes away someone's right to privacy as well. If I ever saw a "Review the Women You Date" app, I'd get very anxious about it. This shit ain't right.
 
This is kind of funny to me. It's like an extension of high school sociology into the adult dating world. Gossiping, popularity, group psychology, etc.-they're all the same as this.
 
This is kind of funny to me. It's like an extension of high school sociology into the adult dating world. Gossiping, popularity, group psychology, etc.-they're all the same as this.

You say this with the undertones of juvenile behavior. This is how people are. It is just that this behavior is blatant when you're too young for tact, and exaggerated in the movies. Besides, you are extrapolating a bit too much.
 
This is not the same as internally comparing/evaluating a person that you meet. Firstly, you've MET the person - not decided to meet or not meet a person based on someone else's 'review' of their own experience. Secondly, how do you know the reviews are accurate? What is a guy rejects a girl because she's crazy. Then that crazy girl goes on here and writes a crazy review? Then that guy is peg based on a false perception? Lastly, what does this mean for a man that keeps getting glowing responses? This is like a players paradise.

Dating isn't about pleasing another person- it's about finding a compatible match. Online dating, Tinder, and apps like these is what makes dating so terrible now. People have an idea of perfection and what they want, and miss opportunities for meeting people who might change their expectations.

I find the main problem is that it can be used abusively against/toward others. Not only do I think about a lot of guys becoming victims of women hating and plotting revenge against them by posting negative, demeaning reviews... but I can also see it going extremely overboard. Like, what if some women use it as revenge and also badmouth the new gf/wife of the guys as well? There are too many issues involved with this app.

It takes away someone's right to privacy as well. If I ever saw a "Review the Women You Date" app, I'd get very anxious about it. This shit ain't right.


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This is not the same as internally comparing/evaluating a person that you meet. Firstly, you've MET the person - not decided to meet or not meet a person based on someone else's 'review' of their own experience. Secondly, how do you know the reviews are accurate? What is a guy rejects a girl because she's crazy. Then that crazy girl goes on here and writes a crazy review? Then that guy is peg based on a false perception? Lastly, what does this mean for a man that keeps getting glowing responses? This is like a players paradise.

Dating isn't about pleasing another person- it's about finding a compatible match. Online dating, Tinder, and apps like these is what makes dating so terrible now. People have an idea of perfection and what they want, and miss opportunities for meeting people who might change their expectations.

Great point and as I mentioned there is so much room for abuse. Just like there is in any realm like in all social networks. It is the anonymous aspect of this that probably makes it most dangerous, not the general concept. Crazy girls are going to talk bad about a guy no matter what just like crazy guys are going to do the same thing. It is going to be done through social media and in person. It’s inevitable. In this form though it takes otherwise normal girls and gives them an opportunity to vent on a guy without fear of repercussion.

From my experience so far and from what my friend showed me, most girls aren’t that way. It is the rare few who are and most give pretty favorable reviews unless the guy was a complete jerk. Meaning a vast majority of the guys fall into the 7 range. They are also building in certain restrictions to help with the abuse. Before guys couldn’t open an account at all which I am not completely sold that allowing them to be able to login is a good idea. You can also only rate guys who you are Facebook friends with but can see ratings for any guy who has signed up for an account. So girls can’t review a guy unless he has willing submitted himself to be reviewed.

I agree dating is already completely dehumanized. This is just taking it to the next step. We don’t try to get to know people or experience personalities. We try to find a list of features and numbers.
 
I find the main problem is that it can be used abusively against/toward others. Not only do I think about a lot of guys becoming victims of women hating and plotting revenge against them by posting negative, demeaning reviews... but I can also see it going extremely overboard. Like, what if some women use it as revenge and also badmouth the new gf/wife of the guys as well? There are too many issues involved with this app.

It takes away someone's right to privacy as well. If I ever saw a "Review the Women You Date" app, I'd get very anxious about it. This shit ain't right.

From what I read, it was worse before. Before guys had no say at all and unless a girl showed them or they created a fake Facebook profile, they couldn't see their ratings. With the new update, they made it so that girls can only rate guys who have signed up. Before any girl who signed up could rate anybody on their list of friends. Then look at what anybody else rated guys.
 
Your opinion is based on the assumption that people aren't fucked-up, aren't judgmental, aren't ridiculous, and tell the truth.

True, I guess I give people more credit than they deserve.
 
True, I guess I give people more credit than they deserve.

The kind of criticism someone gets depends on the medium through which they are criticized.
For instance, youtube gets more negative comments than vimeo. So the credit you give might be within a context that is not apparent to us - those who haven't used the app.
 
This is really stupid. We all make mistakes.. That's part of being human. Would you really want just one silly mistake you made in a past date/relationship eff up your future dating possibilities? wow
 
So ... if I went on a date with a woman, that doest not like me, make every potential woman, that might like me, not have the chance to do so?
 
This is really stupid. We all make mistakes.. That's part of being human. Would you really want just one silly mistake you made in a past date/relationship eff up your future dating possibilities? wow

assuming that girls would take the reviews completely serious. By the response on this forum alone, it seems like most wouldn't care.
 
The kind of criticism someone gets depends on the medium through which they are criticized.
For instance, youtube gets more negative comments than vimeo. So the credit you give might be within a context that is not apparent to us - those who haven't used the app.

True. I however again think that the vast majority of women who use or would use this app, wouldn't abuse it. I also believe most wouldn't review a guy unless it was a really bad or really good date. Of course there are others who would abuse it but I think we are giving too much credit it people being vindictive. For the most part, people are lazy and are not going to actually take the time to do a review unless something really stood out. This does make the app flawed because you will have inconsistent results at opposite ends of the spectrum.

I am not completely sold that this app is immoral or evil. We have rating systems like this for a lot of social aspects. Rating systems for auto mechanics, electricians, etc... Are those rating systems evil? No. Is there a possibility that the reputation of a place could be destroyed by someone abusing that system? Absolutely. Is this always going to be the case. Most of the time no.

For the guy who is a pretty decent person and isn't like trying to murder their dates are for the most part going to be fine. From the responses of ladies on this forum so far, it is pretty obvious that most are going to see the limitations and flaws of an app like this. I find it hard to believe that many people would go onto an app like this to rate someone because a date was, 'meh'. So again for the majority of the time, I really don't think there would be any issues.

Last point. Constructive criticism can be good. Yes, we are not trying to please in dating but at the same time we are. If a girl posted that she thought I was too forward or used too much tongue or something like that. I don't see any reason to be offended. That is her opinion but I don't see any harm in keeping that in mind. We take criticisms like this in work, school and so many other aspects of our lives and we utilize them to get better. Why not in dating?

Sorry for the tangent. I shared because I am torn. Everybody has brought up great points, I just don't see it that black and white. At first I did. I thought, "this is fucked up" and whoever created this shit is one sadistic fuck. But the more I think about it, I don't know if it is. Of course I am using crappy examples by referencing what society does considering how great the world functions on current systems. *sarcasm* I don't know, I thought it was interesting and obviously controversial topics are always the most fun to talk about.