Living and waiting

[Lark]

I dont know if you are familiar or not with the concept of "flow" or whether or not you think that it is a quack concept or not, here's a link:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flow_(psychology)

It is the closest thing I can think of to what I am aiming to discuss here, there are times in my life which I would characterise as being most "alive" and others in which I think I'm simply "waiting" or living in "preparation" and life is something which will happen later.

Sometimes this makes perfect sense, it could be that periods of time in which I am training or studying have been time spent in "preparation" and I've consciously known that I'm putting things off, passing up opportunities to socialise, spend time with people, devote time to pass times or reading or distractions which dont serve the singular purpose of the training or studying but other times its more vague, maybe I'll be carrying a lot of extra work or working especially hard but thinking, in a week, in a month maybe I'll get a rest or I'll be able to do whatever I've deferred.

Do anyone else experience this or know what I'm talking about?

Also I would say that its not about necessarily experiencing a wind fall, like having lots of money, one of the greatest years I ever had I was living on next to no money, couldnt afford to socialise much, walked everywhere because I could afford bus fares etc. Didnt eat well or that often etc. but those were great times.

 

[Dave Fallon]

Hmm... Yes, I've definitely experienced things like this. I think, in an odd way, this is one of the reasons video games are so popular. In order to "win", you often have to immerse yourself in the game, giving it all of your concentration, aiming for a goal, and ultimately achieving. In the real world, such instances where a "flow state" or zone with these three aspects in common is rare:

• A clear goal
• A goal one can achieve directly through being in this state
• The fact that if one fails, one only has to restart the game and try again until reaching the goal

I'm having trouble finding any instance outside of simple tasks (like writing an essay) and "made up" tasks (as I would categorize video games) fitting that bill.

I'll have to read up more on the concept of flow. It is very interesting.

 

[Lark]

Flow isnt the most accurate description of what I'm trying to hit on here, in the difference between living and waiting, although strictly speaking when you're waiting you're still living but I'm trying to talk about a certain "aliveness" or vitality which can be lacking during periods of "waiting".

For me its usually got to do with people, good company and lots of socialising, although not necessarily drinking or dinning or formally socialising but rather social connectedness and people being in contact a lot, also meeting new people easily and having the opportunities to meet new people. Although when I think about it this is kind of your basic extrovert needs.

 

[Dave Fallon]

For me its usually got to do with people, good company and lots of socialising, although not necessarily drinking or dinning or formally socialising but rather social connectedness and people being in contact a lot, also meeting new people easily and having the opportunities to meet new people. Although when I think about it this is kind of your basic extrovert needs.

Oh, ok. Yeah, I think that is partly an extrovert thing. As I was reading your reply, I thought: "What about being at peace, or meditating, or thinking deeply about something?" Maybe the line between "waiting" and "living" is less clear for introverts as it is for extroverts? There are certainly times I feel I am "waiting" and not getting much done (probably playing video games!), but I very very rarely look at "living" as having anything to do with other people.

 

[Erlian]

Hmm... Yes, I've definitely experienced things like this. I think, in an odd way, this is one of the reasons video games are so popular. In order to "win", you often have to immerse yourself in the game, giving it all of your concentration, aiming for a goal, and ultimately achieving. In the real world, such instances where a "flow state" or zone with these three aspects in common is rare:

• A clear goal
• A goal one can achieve directly through being in this state
• The fact that if one fails, one only has to restart the game and try again until reaching the goal

I'm having trouble finding any instance outside of simple tasks (like writing an essay) and "made up" tasks (as I would categorize video games) fitting that bill.

I'll have to read up more on the concept of flow. It is very interesting.

Sports!

It's been a while, but if you're fully immersed in your match it definitely is flow. Preferably a tactical/competetive teamsport for me rather than some single racing against the clock, but it can work in both. When you're 'in the heat of the moment' you're in the flow.
I'd define flow for myself as not being conscious of myself. Going purely on intuition. It has to be fast-paced for me, otherwise my conscious comes in. Flow to me is first and foremost in sports. Secondly it's gaming. It also happens in some social situations when I'm in an heavy debate or when I'm trying to flirt.
Flow is also associated with being succesful. Often if you're not succesful, you become conscious of your failure and reflect on your failure. When you don't fail, you just keep going in an unconscious state.

The point about restarting the game could be true, but not necessarily. In any time-period warfare, I'm pretty sure the soldiers were in the flow when in combat. If they fail they die.
The flow looks like the percieving functions, especially Ne and Se. You are in a heightened state of awareness and act solely & quickly on your intuition.


[MENTION=4115]Lark[/MENTION]
Oh just read flow isn't what you're looking for.
What you mention seems more like doing things that you enjoy and doing things you don't enjoy.
You still do them, because they enable you to do things you enjoy later or simply because there aren't any enjoyable things available at that time.
For example you note studying, learning and preparation. I enjoy learning new stuff.

Another thing in your post seems procrastination or discipline of mind. When you're putting things off and 'prepare' for them, while you're not doing anything.

 

[Lark]

Sports!

It's been a while, but if you're fully immersed in your match it definitely is flow. Preferably a tactical/competetive teamsport for me rather than some single racing against the clock, but it can work in both. When you're 'in the heat of the moment' you're in the flow.
I'd define flow for myself as not being conscious of myself. Going purely on intuition. It has to be fast-paced for me, otherwise my conscious comes in. Flow to me is first and foremost in sports. Secondly it's gaming. It also happens in some social situations when I'm in an heavy debate or when I'm trying to flirt.
Flow is also associated with being succesful. Often if you're not succesful, you become conscious of your failure and reflect on your failure. When you don't fail, you just keep going in an unconscious state.

The point about restarting the game could be true, but not necessarily. In any time-period warfare, I'm pretty sure the soldiers were in the flow when in combat. If they fail they die.
The flow looks like the percieving functions, especially Ne and Se. You are in a heightened state of awareness and act solely & quickly on your intuition.


@Lark
Oh just read flow isn't what you're looking for.
What you mention seems more like doing things that you enjoy and doing things you don't enjoy.
You still do them, because they enable you to do things you enjoy later or simply because there aren't any enjoyable things available at that time.
For example you note studying, learning and preparation. I enjoy learning new stuff.

Another thing in your post seems procrastination or discipline of mind. When you're putting things off and 'prepare' for them, while you're not doing anything.

Its kind of a "days spent in deferral" versus a feeling of aliveness kind of thing maybe.

I also think of it as happiness as a lived state rather than a remembered state.