Is teaching kids emotional intelligence important?
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I skimmed over that article about 'emotional intelligence'. Personally, I think most people (children and adults) could benefit from being taught 'emotional intelligence'. These 5 things the article pointed out are profoundly important for any individual to know.
1) Self-awareness. Knowing our own emotions.
2) Self-regulation. Being able to regulate and control how we react to our emotions.
3) Internal motivation. Having a sense of what’s important in life.
4) Empathy. Understanding the emotions of others.
5) Social skills. Being able to build social connections.
Unfortunately it can be very challenging for a public school teacher to teach a subject like 'emotional intelligence' because many people feel that teaching these skills is the parents job. However, for anyone who has taught children or worked in fields with children, you know there are many kids who could benefit from being taught these skills. In addition, anyone who has worked in any field also knows there are a lot of people in general who could benefit from being taught 'emotional intelligence' skills.
So should emotional intelligence be taught in schools. I would say yes but it would have to be woven into the context of other subject lessons and even then you run the risk of wading in some dangerous waters, which a lot of teachers don't want to risk. However, 'emotional intelligence' falls under the scope of school counselors, if school counselors would pick that up and get involved in teaching 'emotional intelligence' skills that would be wonderful.
The way the US school systems work now, in order to teach 'emotional intelligence' there would have to be some kind of standardized methods approved by each state that could be followed by all teachers. This is to prevent people from teaching their own interpretation of 'emotional intelligence'. This may or may not exist at this point, Im not sure.
The department of education in Massachusetts has a pretty good standardized methodology for teaching bullying prevention. Heres a link for anyone interested. They've done a good job putting this together.http://www.doe.mass.edu/bullying/
There probably are some other states out there weaving 'emotional intelligence' into their curriculum but I would imagine its probably few and far between. At this point I would imagine most of it is aimed more at addressing bullying, which falls under the category of 'emotional intelligence', but the wheels of institutional bureaucracy turn very slowly and even though 'emotional intelligence' may someday find its way into school curriculums it will probably be a slow go.
Interesting subject.
1) Self-awareness. Knowing our own emotions.
2) Self-regulation. Being able to regulate and control how we react to our emotions.
3) Internal motivation. Having a sense of what’s important in life.
4) Empathy. Understanding the emotions of others.
5) Social skills. Being able to build social connections.
Unfortunately it can be very challenging for a public school teacher to teach a subject like 'emotional intelligence' because many people feel that teaching these skills is the parents job. However, for anyone who has taught children or worked in fields with children, you know there are many kids who could benefit from being taught these skills. In addition, anyone who has worked in any field also knows there are a lot of people in general who could benefit from being taught 'emotional intelligence' skills.
So should emotional intelligence be taught in schools. I would say yes but it would have to be woven into the context of other subject lessons and even then you run the risk of wading in some dangerous waters, which a lot of teachers don't want to risk. However, 'emotional intelligence' falls under the scope of school counselors, if school counselors would pick that up and get involved in teaching 'emotional intelligence' skills that would be wonderful.
The way the US school systems work now, in order to teach 'emotional intelligence' there would have to be some kind of standardized methods approved by each state that could be followed by all teachers. This is to prevent people from teaching their own interpretation of 'emotional intelligence'. This may or may not exist at this point, Im not sure.
The department of education in Massachusetts has a pretty good standardized methodology for teaching bullying prevention. Heres a link for anyone interested. They've done a good job putting this together.http://www.doe.mass.edu/bullying/
There probably are some other states out there weaving 'emotional intelligence' into their curriculum but I would imagine its probably few and far between. At this point I would imagine most of it is aimed more at addressing bullying, which falls under the category of 'emotional intelligence', but the wheels of institutional bureaucracy turn very slowly and even though 'emotional intelligence' may someday find its way into school curriculums it will probably be a slow go.
Interesting subject.
- Sep 28, 2008
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I feel like it's becoming even more important now to specifically teach emotional intelligence because we are slowly losing the learning process of socializing at a young age. 20-30 years ago kids did a LOT of social activity at an early age and now they are going more online earlier and getting less social activity which stunts that area of growth considerably.
We need to make sure they are being taught emotional intelligence both at home and at school.
We need to make sure they are being taught emotional intelligence both at home and at school.
Also aiming at the fact that those adults who aren't so evolved into emotional intelligence, have a possibility of being more reckless into stressful situations, or situations that attack their integrity. It has been said that early child development is of great importance when it comes to determining the future standpoint of adults, so I believe a correlation can also be made with that.
Also with the upcoming of more technology, more kids are being adapted to the use of technology, which also leads to less social necessities throughout social media, and so on.
I must say I prefer the olden days where communication was more of sending letters, and face to face interaction, moreover than now.
I mean, I know it sounds funny, but not all classes need to be in a formal setting of formal/semester length. I was just thinking that something shorter, like a week long intensive or something might make kids feel more like it's a practical skill and a fun break rather than your normal the normal obligatory class with homework and such. I think this is how we had sex-ed. It was like a week of health class or something, much anticipated by everyone.
It is extremely important. My parents didn't teach me emotional intelligence, so I'm really struggling to fix that now.
If parents aren't emotionally tuned-in to their children enough to not neglect them emotionally (which is the same thing as teaching them to be emotionally intelligent), the kids will suffer later in life via depression and other issues.
If parents aren't emotionally tuned-in to their children enough to not neglect them emotionally (which is the same thing as teaching them to be emotionally intelligent), the kids will suffer later in life via depression and other issues.
I see. Having a seminar would probably also help developing emotional intelligence by learning the ideas and perspectives of others from their self expression outcomes.
I agree, many parents aren't the greatest at nurturing their kids emotionally, which leads to kids having to form some type of development on their own, & self teaching. This can go on either side of the spectrum between good or bad for the upbringing of these kids, depending on their environments, and other factors.
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I agree with some of what's been mentioned above; if emotional intelligence is incorporated as part of a curriculum, it should probably be a seminar. Moreover, it should cover new topics, things that students would not have already learned in various Health classes. One of my friends was subjected to two semesters of a glorified Health class that only covered the basics of health, which all the students already knew about. It was a waste of a good opportunity.
I know personally, I struggle with some of the facets of high emotional intelligence, so I wish there was something in school that would have helped. My parents worked a lot when I was younger, and were largely absent in my personal life.
I know personally, I struggle with some of the facets of high emotional intelligence, so I wish there was something in school that would have helped. My parents worked a lot when I was younger, and were largely absent in my personal life.
Yeah, we can all use to improve on emotional intelligence skills. Good point and good for you for recognizing and posting that. How emotionally intelligent!! You're doing better than you think!
I say definitely. As others have pointed out, technology greatly limits the opportunity to develop face-to-face emotional intelligence. In general though, I think many struggle to understand and reconcile their emotions for one reason or another. Many strides could be made by simply heightening awareness of the need for emotinal intelligence.
This is something I very much wish was done with me as a child. I personally struggle hardcover to even identify my own emotions, much less those of other people. There are even times where I may feel empathy, but showing it us nearly impossible because I don't know the right way to do it. It makes it very difficult to relate to people.
Being neurodiverse makes the issue even more difficult because I don't process things emotionally the way neurotypicals do.
Furthermore, my family situation growing up was not geared toward emotional intelligence. My dad is an INTP, my mother an ISTJ, my grandfather an ESTJ, and my brother an ENTP. And I'm INTJ. I do better with math and data and theory than I do the emotions behind why someone said what they did and why or how the other person reacted to it.
Btw, as far as emotional intelligence goes, nothing can beat this
Being neurodiverse makes the issue even more difficult because I don't process things emotionally the way neurotypicals do.
Furthermore, my family situation growing up was not geared toward emotional intelligence. My dad is an INTP, my mother an ISTJ, my grandfather an ESTJ, and my brother an ENTP. And I'm INTJ. I do better with math and data and theory than I do the emotions behind why someone said what they did and why or how the other person reacted to it.
Btw, as far as emotional intelligence goes, nothing can beat this
My parents didn't teach me, but I think I have a good understanding of psychology intuitively (of course I am bad at many other things naturally, just as I'm good at this naturally).
I think what parents can do is just introduce the idea that you can examine yourself and your life, ask how things are going, and not just keep going with the flow -- try to take control of your satisfaction and be honest and clear-thinking about it.
I think what parents can do is just introduce the idea that you can examine yourself and your life, ask how things are going, and not just keep going with the flow -- try to take control of your satisfaction and be honest and clear-thinking about it.
I feel we teach children more than we realize. If your child acts like they are not listening, remember they are always watching and learning. Teaching emotions to a child is best taught by actions and examples, imo; how we act and how we live. I also feel their emotions are affected to a higher degree by how they see us treat them and each other.
I don't know, I did not like going to elementary school because all the kids were so psycho, inconsiderate and hurtful to each other.
You can show by example like [MENTION=680]just me[/MENTION] said, but you cannot shove stuff down their throat, because if you do that they just become pretentious pricks who chose when to be emotionally intelligent.
You cannot teach empathy, you can only teach how to emulate it and that is not a good way to do it, at-least that is what I think.
I believe it would be better to try to spark a kids development more naturally though your own actions and thus example and through your own unintended remarks,
else you're just handing the kid a rule set like "don't steal, or you will go to jail", rule sets have no substance to them if they are not followed by ones own decision regardless of what consequences there may or may not be.
I think teaching a kid emotional intelligence any other way than by your own actions and example in life is like giving a loaded weapon to them.
It'll be like you're saying: If you behave this way, even if you don't really mean it, people will like you and believe you, it will help you get the things you want and manipulate them better
So whilst I think the development of emotional intelligence is important, I believe it has to be done in a way that triggers its development naturally subconsciously in the manner intended.
And I really do think that can only be done by showing it through your own actions. Not by the manner I see some moms do to their kids and trying to guilt trip them into it:
"Do you think <name of some kid> likes you doing that?", "How do you think <name of kid> must feel?" "Wouldn't it be more fun for all if <enter solution>" because that is saying: behave like this or you won't be approved of by society, to get approval you must learn to pretend.
The alternative of showing it through your own actions, like giving a few cents to a street musician, beggar or homeless person, helping others out etc etc shows it not as a rule but as an example of a positive trait. especially if it is out of consideration towards someone else, and if it sometimes is in things out of consideration for them as well. Say like a simple thing like treating your kid to something fun, not because he or she was good, but because you noticed it would do them good regardless. And it's ok to say that. Just don't shove your ideas down a kids throat
I'm not sure that I managed to get my point across, I feel like I am rambling, but yea, I think most of you know my intent well enough by now to puzzle it together
You can show by example like [MENTION=680]just me[/MENTION] said, but you cannot shove stuff down their throat, because if you do that they just become pretentious pricks who chose when to be emotionally intelligent.
You cannot teach empathy, you can only teach how to emulate it and that is not a good way to do it, at-least that is what I think.
I believe it would be better to try to spark a kids development more naturally though your own actions and thus example and through your own unintended remarks,
else you're just handing the kid a rule set like "don't steal, or you will go to jail", rule sets have no substance to them if they are not followed by ones own decision regardless of what consequences there may or may not be.
I think teaching a kid emotional intelligence any other way than by your own actions and example in life is like giving a loaded weapon to them.
It'll be like you're saying: If you behave this way, even if you don't really mean it, people will like you and believe you, it will help you get the things you want and manipulate them better
So whilst I think the development of emotional intelligence is important, I believe it has to be done in a way that triggers its development naturally subconsciously in the manner intended.
And I really do think that can only be done by showing it through your own actions. Not by the manner I see some moms do to their kids and trying to guilt trip them into it:
"Do you think <name of some kid> likes you doing that?", "How do you think <name of kid> must feel?" "Wouldn't it be more fun for all if <enter solution>" because that is saying: behave like this or you won't be approved of by society, to get approval you must learn to pretend.
The alternative of showing it through your own actions, like giving a few cents to a street musician, beggar or homeless person, helping others out etc etc shows it not as a rule but as an example of a positive trait. especially if it is out of consideration towards someone else, and if it sometimes is in things out of consideration for them as well. Say like a simple thing like treating your kid to something fun, not because he or she was good, but because you noticed it would do them good regardless. And it's ok to say that. Just don't shove your ideas down a kids throat
I'm not sure that I managed to get my point across, I feel like I am rambling, but yea, I think most of you know my intent well enough by now to puzzle it together