[INFJ] - Interesting Article | INFJ Forum

[INFJ] Interesting Article

Paul S

Newbie
Aug 11, 2017
44
116
56
Scotland
MBTI
INFJ
Enneagram
9
Article I found in The Independent...

'All emotions can be positive in some contexts'
People might be happier feeling negative emotions, if they are the ones they want to have, according to a new study.
Traditionally, people assume that the key to happiness is experiencing positive emotions, like pleasure or joy. But it can be just as important to feel bad things too, the new research published by the American Psychological Association suggests.
"Happiness is more than simply feeling pleasure and avoiding pain," said lead researcher Maya Tamir from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, in a statement. "Happiness is about having experiences that are meaningful and valuable, including emotions that you think are the right ones to have.
"All emotions can be positive in some contexts and negative in others, regardless of whether they are pleasant or unpleasant."
Professor Tamir said that the study was the first to find a relationship between happiness and the desire to experience emotions - even when those emotions are bad.
It looked at 2,324 university students from eight different countries. They were asked what emotions they desired, what emotions they actually felt, and whether they were satisfied with their life and experienced depressive symptoms.
Read More
It found that while people generally wanted more pleasant emotions and fewer bad ones, that wasn't always the case. Some 11 per cent of the participants wanted to feel less good emotions like love and empathy, and 10 per cent wanted to feel more unpleasant ones, like anger and hatred.
The study also found that the people who experienced more of the emotions they desired - whether or not those emotions were good or bad - were more satisfied with life and had less depressive symptoms.
Such findings might help people to re-consider whether their behaviour is really making them happy, Professor Tamir said.
"People want to feel very good all the time in Western cultures, especially in the United States," Tamir said."Even if they feel good most of the time, they may still think that they should feel even better, which might make them less happy overall."
More work needs to be done to check whether feeling desired emotions leads to happiness or whether it is simply associated with it, the authors said. They also said the research only looked at what are called negative self-enhancing emotions, like hatred, hostility and contempt, and extra work could look at other unpleasant emotions like fear, guilt and shame.
 
Reading this back, I've gone quite off-topic with my commentary, but I think it could spark a nice discussion.


This article presupposes that emotions have to be felt in the right context. Sure, but is it healthy to experience all those contextualised situations? Doubtful. For instance, I have felt enough shame to last a lifetime, several even, and most of the time it wasn't me doing something wrong/shameful that triggered it.

While I am a very emotional person (in some cases quite involuntary), I'd love to have an outlet for my negative emotions, so I don't go around and smash someone's head in if I am pushed too far. In this society it has become exhausting not to get frustrated with the infantile behaviour of people that should know better. That's what I thought at least until someone reminded me that I shouldn't compare normal people's behaviour with mine. She was right, but I won't get into that now. Fact is, I would like to channel my negative emotions so I can learn to handle confrontations better (because I would have dealt with them beforehand), but that doesn't mean that I'd want to feel those emotions.

We do have an extensive range of emotions, some of which are not encouraged to be felt in modern society. Having prior experience with one or another negative emotion could help the individual in dealing with that emotion productively should such a situation occur that triggers said emotion. However, I am still unsure that we, as a society, wouldn't become even more zombie-like if we did something like that. Moreover, it feels like it might have some ramifications towards expressing more negative behaviour as well. I know this isn't the context of this article, but methods to experiencing negative emotions (possibly by utilising VR) could be exploited by terrorists to desensitise their recruits emotionally. In general, this could desensitise anyone, in excessive use (which most people are prone to do), making us even more used to having negative emotions and maybe start acting on them, thus creating a downward spiral.

It kind of depends on how they want to acheive that. Nonetheless, this is a bad idea. The potential risks would outweigh the uses by far.


What do you think?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gaze and Paul S
Hi Ginny, enjoyed your post and agree - the article could spark a fair amount of discussion/debate.

However, I've taken the article content differently. I was intrigued that the study allegedly shows that given a choice, some would prefer to feel more anger and hatred (albeit only 10%).

Perhaps a clue to that lies in what you said, in that it has become exhausting being frustrated at the infantile behaviour of others. Are we being shaped by social norms to be far too accepting and polite? Is there a growing resentment by those who DO know better, that they have to be seen to be understanding and to NOT vent that anger even when morally it would be completely justified?

As an example, I have experienced first hand how passive and negligent we have become in Scotland, to dealing with criminal behaviour. There is more effort spent on the rehabilitation of the criminal compared to the rebuilding of the victim. There needs to be a balance. The scales of justice are tipping too far the other way. But I use this as a personal example, please don't think I'm completely Old Testament - I have also witnessed the successful rehabilitation of offenders and quite rightfully so. But as I say, we are losing focus with regard to proper justice for the victim. So where is the forum for the victims and their families to vent that frustration, that anger?

Like you mentioned Ginny, you would love an outlet, but sometimes it's just not there fully to satisfy the "purge" of anger and frustration that grows. In times to come will that 10% become 40%. Dissatisfaction is spreading right across the board - but that's another topic I suppose.

Another part of the article caught my eye. That happiness appears to arise even when the emotions, although not considered joyous, are still considered meaningful. How well it would do people to know this! Especially the constant thrill seeking junkies who believe they have to be "on" 24 hours. Have to keep up with the social media, the reality TV, the next fashion trend. We all know these poor hamsters caught in the wheel, trying to buy some form of happiness and so eager to update it to the rest of the world. All the while the void in their soul grows, and they can't explain it.

There is no meaningful pursuit in modern society, besides a pursuit that benefits you AND others. This is what brings meaning to your life.

Joy is great, but it isn't everything! Melancholy is equally great! All the range of emotions have their merits, it's how we use them that matters. As you alluded to Ginny, are we suppressing the full range of our emotions in order to be polite? Civil? Law abiding even?

Is there anyone here who would choose NEVER to feel anger again? Never feel despair again? Never feel heartache again? Surely we have the full range because we NEED the full range of emotions!? Would the disappearance of so called negative emotions upset the balance...?

Would we be all smiling zombies?
 
  • Like
Reactions: seira0807 and Gaze
I don't think anyone would want to limit their range of emotions, it is there for a reason after all. It is just that social conditioning makes everyone believe that negative emotions are inherently bad. In specific surroundings negative emotions can have a bad impact. I mentioned anger, so I'll refer to this example. My frustration with a specific human being is so profound that when this person acts the way she does (and therewith also violates my privacy), I have come to have such high amounts of - I think - adrenaline in my system that my hands are shaking uncontrollably. So when I say that I need an outlet, it is to at least stop the shaking. I would never give up my anger, it can motivate me to stand up for my own sanity instead of bowing down to whatever is thrown at me.

Criminal injustice is also one of those things that make me angry, though in a less involved kind of way. I sense the wrongness of it all, the imbalance, but when I am not there when it happens, when it's not something happening to me or someone I love, it doesn't become physical. I can stay as objective-but-passionate as any INFJ.

Our society has devolved (if you don't mind my use of this radical term), social media is the killer of interpersonal relationships, in the long haul. At least the way that introverted feelers perceive it. We need people, it's as simple as that. We don't need mindless zombies that merely reiterate what is said by whom (in any mainstream media), without turning on their heads and think for themselves. All they want is the next high of a like to a post, a self-indulgent selfie, choose what you will. For a few years, I have spent two hours daily on FB catching up on anything on my screen. If I had used that time to engage with anyone or do my homework, I would be a lot happier than I am now. Engaging with people who are physically present gives me a much bigger high than any like could. And those idiots who are linked up all the time, how can they not realise that they make themselves into zombies, superficial as they are, neglecting to make experiences in the tangible universe? -- Well, I suppose this is why I don't have any friends, not for ten years.

Anyone wants to experience the full range of their emotions, but foul creatures as they become, they will probably use the wrong way to acheive it. Once people start living again, the emotions will be there. All the books we read, the TV programs and films we see, the music we listen to, those are the feelings that we sometimes wish we had; we are envious of the people that live, but there is always something to keep them from living, mostly the very things that make them envious. They just don't see what we inherently know as truth.

With the advancement of technology and the continuing civilisation process, we tend to repress in personal interactions but lash out non-personal interaction. It is a farce. People put on a mask and everyone who isn't conforming gets shoved away. Unicorns feel alone, and I think this is why, because everyone represses what makes them special and nobody has any idea of how to express their uniqueness to someone else. Most people seek someone unique, but we're going to have a hard time acheiving it when everyone acts like the first zombie of the advent of human decay. (Gosh, that sounded almost poetic :smirkcat:)

Emotions are what make us human, our capability to emote makes us compassionate, and we needn't be limited in our range of feeling by arbitrary rules of conformity. I definitely won't, even if it sets me apart from society. At least then I know I am still me.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gaze and Paul S
This made me think of how superficial I feel sometimes when I smile to other people. Or the Hollywood stereotype were people are beautiful and happy … but somehow something is missing.

Maybe we need a good balance a happy and sad in our lives.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Paul S