INFPs feeling hurt | INFJ Forum

INFPs feeling hurt

Edith

little birdy
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Nov 13, 2010
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I found this quote today:

 
Does this make INFPs reluctant to trust people?

Do past hurts influence INFPs to define better boundaries, so that they are not crossed accidentally?

I just sounds very daunting to think there are people who cannot get over offense - the whole tiptoeing over eggshells thing comes to mind.
 
I grant most people the benefit of the doubt immediately.. Yes.. I tend to think the best of people immediately so trust for me is something to be lost rather than won...BUT once someone betrays me, I tend to cut them off.. I don't want to be 'kinda' friends with them... I don't want them to feel like they have to walk on egg shells and I don't want to bother wondering if they will intentionally harm me again in the future. I like things to be lighthearted and free with people, not complicated.

If I have a problem in a relationship or any other aspect of my life... I consult those close to me.
I definitely let them know how I feel. I talk to my s.o., or my mom, my brother, my best friend.. Hell, even a few co-workers I'm close with.
It feels better to share it, because I know sometimes I can blow things out of proportion in my head.
But I am unsure of whether I am an INFP or INFJ..
 
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I grant trust from the outset as well but I forgive everyone all the time and trust again.
 
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I don't forgive easily. It's much harder to let people in as much if they violate trust or loyalty. I'm not perfect anyway. I've hurt people in my life, so I can't claim the monopoly on feeling hurt. But it's interesting to watch people take and take without giving. Yeah, even if you hurt me, I will still talk or listen to you, not because I want to but because I'd feel like a tool if I didn't, so out of courtesy I will but I've probably written you off. But it probably doesn't matter, since most of the time, the person isn't aware that they've ticked me off that much, which is the problem. They didn't care enough. But I guess you can't focus on the hurt forever, because it's stunting. You have to move on with your life at some point. Yes, the person has done me wrong, but what am I gonna do? I'd look stupid if I continue to be upset - which is what I realized in the end, so you just don't show your hurt. Instead, you let them be who they are. You later realize that their importance in your life has diminished and you expect less of them as time goes by.