INFJ, INFP, or something else? | INFJ Forum

INFJ, INFP, or something else?

Discussion in 'The INFJ Typology' started by Jacob Bower, Apr 18, 2020.

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  1. INFJ

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  2. INFP

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  3. ISFJ

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  4. INTP

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  5. ENTP

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  6. ENFP

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  1. Jacob Bower

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    Hello,

    I have recently immersed myself into the MBTI community and I am questioning everything I ever thought about myself so I thought I would ask for some help with typing :)

    I have always had pretty unique interests like learning languages and genealogy. I tend to cycle back to past interests because I just love learning about everything. When I was little, I would spend hours reading about different topics.

    I have OCD and GAD, as well as separation anxiety with family members. My dad passed away a couple of years ago which has kind of escalated these issues.

    I have without a doubt always loved categorization and trying to place myself somewhere (as with MBTI).

    I find myself easily bored at school and tend to not take detailed notes but rather just listen and make sense of it myself. I have never struggled in school and often am able to make connections between topics that enable me to not have to pay attention as much if that makes sense.

    I would feel refreshed with a weekend of alone time. I often find myself socializing just because I want to maintain my friendships and ensure that we maintain the strong connection we have. I enjoy having meaningful conversations and can be very very loud and animated during them but I definitely have limits. Many people see me as social due to this and are very surprised to hear that I think of myself as an introvert. However, I am only social to ensure that I have meaningful connections with friends rather than for the mere sake of socializing. I definitely get more energy from learning and discovering things about myself and the world than through socialization.

    I have never been very coordinated or good at sports or even crafts.

    I am extraordinarily curious. Everything makes me curious. I have always wanted to know everything about everything. I want to gain a deeper understanding of why people think the way they do, why the universe works the way it does, just why everything is as it is. I honestly do not know anything that does NOT interest me. Biology, astrophysics, psychology, philosophy, geography, etc. ALL interest me strongly. I love thinking about new concepts and learning about all sorts of theories. I could have conversations with people about these types of things for hours. I like being in control at times but it also stresses me out and I have difficulty feeling comfortable enough to be assertive with them. I'd rather someone else lead and I could give input.

    I tend to like reading as long as the book has a deeper meaning or allegory behind it. I love books such as 1984 that have philosophical and theoretical ideas tied into it. As a child, I loved Narnia and its allegories to Christianity.

    I am SO uncoordinated. People often laugh at me when I try to do something with my hands. I cannot play sports or do crafts.

    I am an artistic person, but I do not feel like the best artist myself, especially in terms of drawing and painting, since I am so uncoordinated. I like admiring art, however, and love trying to gain some deeper meaning out of it. My favorite media would have to be photography and literature.

    I think about the past a lot, but have to often stop myself because something makes me sad. However, I enjoy thinking about past memories and often find myself wondering what I was thinking when I did certain things---I am a big overthinker. I have never been really able to think about the present as I'm quite future-oriented. On vacations, I find it hard to relax in the moment and find myself thinking about what we are going to do next. The future frightens me as uncertainty frightens me more than anything. I look forward to the future, but not knowing concretely how everything is going to turn out stresses me out.

    I often help others. I would feel absolutely terrible if I didn't. I would imagine a variety of scenarios that would happen if I did not help them and would feel very guilty. Friends often come to me with their issues for emotional support and no matter what the issue is I will try my best to comfort them. If I feel like I was not comforting enough at the time due to distractions, I will reach out to them later to make sure they are ok.

    I need logical consistency to an extent. I get annoyed when people are irrational, but I am irrational myself at times, so it's pretty hypocritical.

    I control others more than I'd like to admit. I am not super controlling but I definitely do things to get a certain response out of someone. I am very very protective of my close relationships and become extremely worried when people do not respond to me as I fear our relationship breaking down. For example, although I may not like to admit it, I get jealous if I feel someone is becoming close with my best friend. I am extremely sensitive overall but often have difficulty describing my feelings.

    My hobbies are doing research, using the internet to learn more things, watching documentaries, learning languages, social media to be in the loop as to what others are doing, and more that I can't think of right now. Lately, I've been loving philosophy and I could discuss any theoretical or philosophical topic for hours. It would invigorate me.

    My learning style is quite unique. I am good at memorization but that is not my primary way of learning. As I stated earlier, I am good at combining things to understand them better as well as applying big concepts to smaller things. I am really intuitive and this helps me especially in math in science when I can visualize patterns. For example, teachers have always told me to show my work more because I can solve things very intuitively without going through the steps. I am ok at planning and pretty good at getting things done effectively when I put my mind to it. However, I do often procrastinate until the night before the deadline but I make sure to do them no matter what.

    Understanding myself and my place in the world, as well as relationships with those I love, are the most important things in my life. I want to make a change of some sort in the world---I do not know what yet but I want to do something that is either genuinely helpful or genuinely insightful for the world. I don’t want to leave the earth without having had a purpose.

    I fear something bad happening to my family or me or the world overall. I play out scenarios in my head of bad things happening and that terrifies me. I hate arrogance and lack of understanding. Misunderstandings PAIN me to the extent I can't focus on anything else and find myself constantly trying to make sure everything is ok with the person. I similarly get extraordinarily anxious when a friend doesn’t respond to my messages, worrying they don’t like me, even when I know rationally that isn’t true. I always apologize no matter what. If I ever overshare or feel I was too overbearing, I intensely and compulsively apologize, since I tend not to unless I feel very comfortable, which I worry i misjudge. I visualize scenarios of becoming distant with friends or disliked by people if I don’t.

    I am relatively attached to reality but I often find myself deep in thought, almost constantly. It's not necessarily visually daydreaming but it's deep thought, which can lead me to not being totally aware of my surroundings.

    It takes me a while to make an important decision, but once it's set in my mind, it's set in my mind and there's no going back unless there's a good explanation for it. I am indecisive but once I have made a decision it causes too much anxiety to change it. I appear indecisive to many but future uncertainties stress me out and I always need to have an answer and decision for everything.

    I am very emotional and I have difficulty dealing with them myself. I often tell my family members or a close friend when I’m feeling stressed. I follow my emotions more than anything which can lead to being impulsive at times. For example, I'll often spiral worrying that someone is mad at me or something bad has happened to someone I love leading me to be somewhat impulsive, even though I should logically know better. Also, if I sense someone is angry or stressed, I am immediately on edge and find it hard to focus on anything else and will compulsively text them to make sure everything is ok.

    I often change what I say regarding my beliefs on a topic depending on the person and what is being talked about. I am not very assertive/confrontational at all when I like a person and want to become closer with them. However, I am pretty stubborn and do not change my actual beliefs very often. I am quite sarcastic with close friends but if I later feel I went too far, I will compulsively apologize and feel deeply regretful.

    I respect authority if I agree with their reasoning. If I find something morally or logically flawed in a rule, I will not respect it.

    The ideal life would be being genuinely happy, making a difference, being with someone you truly love and care for, having meaningful close relationships, and having a true understanding of yourself and the world. This is largely unrealistic, but it is ideal.

    I have been told I am not assertive enough and tend to be a suck-up because I worry about hurting others' feelings. However, if someone criticizes me and my feelings are hurt, I may lash out but in a somewhat respectable way and still apologize later and overthink it.

    I have never met anyone like me at all, and it would be nice to meet someone with similar cognitive processes to relate to. Many people have said that I’m unlike anyone else they know and I am quite eccentric. However, with most, I mask this eccentricity and can act similar to others in a situation. Due to this, I have trouble imagining there could be a significant number of people that are similar to me. However, I would LOVE to have someone to completely relate to and talk about interests with.

    I have become EXTREMELY hyper focused on MBTI now and am having extreme doubts about what I think my type is. This happens to me with nearly everything I become wrapped up in. I constantly doubt my own mind and need reassurance, especially when I'm thinking I'm a type with common mistyping. I think this is probably my OCD, but it could be a type thing? I also feel people think I’m ISFJ due to my anxieties but I strongly do not believe this to be true.

    Many have typed me as xNFP but I truly feel I cannot relax until a decision is made and I am not nearly as in touch with my emotions as most INFPs seem to be. I am also not as individualistic and do not have the extreme desire to be ~special~.

    Sorry this is so long and I would be beyond grateful for any insight! :)
     
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  2. OP
    Jacob Bower

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    Yikes, I said I was uncoordinated twice!
     
  3. Aneirin

    Aneirin AKA, David
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    welcome to the forum. . may you find the answers to your quest for whatever it is that you seek
     
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  4. noisebloom

    noisebloom theory conspirer
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    I would guess INFJ using the voodoo magic of MBTI:
    • Future-focused, troubles staying present (Ni-dom, Inf Se)
    • "I often help others. I would feel absolutely terrible if I didn't." (Fe)
    • "I often change what I say regarding my beliefs on a topic depending on the person and what is being talked about." (Fe)
    This one really stuck out to me:
    • "I control others more than I'd like to admit."
    Some prominent dictators throughout history were INFJs, and you don't get to be a good dictator without being hella controlling... so INFJ fits.

    Unfortunately, there are not many INFJs on this forum, so you'll be an outsider here.
     
  5. OP
    Jacob Bower

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    Thank you so much! I am beginning to wonder if I am an ENTP. Could that be the case also?
     
  6. OP
    Jacob Bower

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    Ahh now I’m thinking I’m ENFP because I feel like I’m too social and bubbly to be an INFJ. But I feel like I lead with Ni? So I’m not sure! I really have trouble clarifying between Ni and Ne and Fi and Fe.
     
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