Identity theft | INFJ Forum

Identity theft

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by Siamese cat, Mar 1, 2010.

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  1. Siamese cat

    Siamese cat Madame Cat strikes again

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    Have you ever had someone who out of the blue just started impersonating your behavior, and stealing (maybe stealing is to strong word but right now I just can't think of any better) your personality? What did you do, or what would you do if it was you in this situation?

    Some time ago I went out with a friend of mine and some of hers friend for a drink. For a long time prior to that I was seeing her alone because I had some health issues and couldn't go out. I was sitting there looking at her talking like me, impersonating my behavior, my gesticulation, talking about some things that happened to me like they happened to her and I was taken completely of guard, I didn't know what to think.

    I know that Oscar Wild said that impersonation is the biggest form of flattery, but this was flat out rude, and kind of offensive.

    And while I'm at this topic another question for you, from what things do you draw your own sense of identity?
     
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  2. Barnabas

    Barnabas Time Lord

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    Not personally but I've seen it happen, I guess it really depends on whether or not they were genuinely followin your style because they found it to be admirable or because they were trying t make a joke or be offensive. That i cannot tell you.


    However I would say mt personality is drawn from several sources, three books in particular are "To Kill a Mockingbird," "The Call," and of course the most influential is the Bible. Outside of that Music, Country and Christian Rock make up the majority of my genre. I guess to qoute George Strait "I'm alittle more country then that." And of course I couldn't possibly not mention my friends and family.
     
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  3. SpaceCowgirl

    SpaceCowgirl vanilla cat

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    I find myself doing this sometimes completely by accident, but only the talking similarly part. I think its natural to act similar to people you spend a lot of time with to some extent, like the way groups of friends develop their own slang. I would say that she might not know what shes doing but:
    I don't get this part. Was she actually lying and saying those thing did happen to her or was she telling story's about you implying she was there? Either way I'd talk to her about it. Maybe shes feeling insecure lately(that when I find myself talking like other people). Not saying her actions were justified it does sound really rude, but it also sounds like she does admire you which means she will most likely listen to you and stop if you bring it to her attention.

    I draw my identity from everything, my interests, my beliefs, my feelings, my friends. Can't really say any one of them is more important to me.
     
  4. Skoffin

    Skoffin <font color=#00EE99>She Whose Name We Do Not Speak

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    I think we've had a thread exactly like this before, but I can't be bothered to find it and copy pasta my post from it.
    I am pretty sure my sister was trying to imitate me, from the type of clothes that I wore, to the music I listened to, shows/movies I liked, the way I spoke and even to the illnesses I was inflicted with. Illnesses?! Honestly, why is having a disease something worth making your own?1
    What's more infuriating than her stealing my personality traits though is the fact that she tried to pass them off as her own and make out that I'm imitating her.

    Examples:
    clothes: One week we went into a store and looked around, she remarked on one shirt and said she didn't like the style. I said I liked it. Next week we walk past the same store, she looks at the exact same shirt and remarks how she likes it and might but it. When I remind her of what she said the previous week about hating it she claims she never said that or even saw it before.

    Music: When I first started liking rock and metal music I started to like a band called Disturbed, during a time when my sister was listening to abominations such as Brittany spears. My sister came to know of this band through me, to this day she claims she showed me them and that she got me into metal and rock music.

    Tv: I admit, quite a bit of my quirks and taste come from my mother, s such I came to be a fan of Yes minister through her. My sister watches two episodes of the thing and never goes back to it, but not before listing it on her Internet profiles under 'favourite tv shows'. (Looking at that list at all was pretty creepy actually, as it had quite a bit of similarity between my own 'lists' minus the crap like Brits and lame tv shows. I suppose one might think it possible that she realy did like a lot of the stuff she listed, but I call bull on that considering there are bands listed on there which she has said to me, on numerous occassions, to stop playing because she hates their music. )

    Speech: I get on quite well with my two brothers we three don't get on well with her. My sister at one point decided to start acting and talking like me around them, at which point my brothers backed away and later remarked to me about how weird and awkward it was. She then starts upping this to people outside our family and makes friends, then when people remark on the similarity in our behaviour she talks about how I am imitating my big sister.

    Illnesses: In my early adolescene I started getting weird rashes on my hands that got progressively worse for a few years, then went relatively normal again for a bit. When I had it bad she would remark that she had bad hands too (despite the fact that you couldn't see the evidence), the sweet irony was when my hands started to get better hers started heading the way mine did. It got annoying though when she was diagnosed with having dermatidus and since her hands looked the way mine did I assumed I had the same thing (particularly as it is a heriditary disease) at which she responded with... I'm just trying to copy her, and that since my hands weren't as bad I have no write to complain anyway. wtf?
    Another time a doctor claimed I had mild asthma, which I didn't believe anyway as I thought doctors were incompentent, and as soon as it was said to my sister she claims that she also had asthma.

    Luckily though, my sister is not as insane as she used to be. :mtap:
     
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  5. bamf

    bamf Is Watching You
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    (I thought this was about monetary identity theft, disregard if you want, or I can delete it)
    I got my bank account and paypal account hacked once.
    Someone using a proxy out of China used it to pay for their video game subscription. The asshole was never caught.
     
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  6. OP
    Siamese cat

    Siamese cat Madame Cat strikes again

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    To Scoffin: You understood me completely, that was my case. And your examples were painfully familiar.

    I was looking for the similar topic before opening this, but couldn't find one. And thank you for having the patience to respond here.

    You say that it's better now with your sister. Did she just one day stop with that or something else happened?

    My problem was the same, and it bothered me that my friend was acting dumb when I confronted her about it, and it bothered me actually that that mattered to me that much, but we shared the group of friends, and after some time I started to feel like a fake. She was highly extroverted thus she was expressing what she perceived as my traits rather actively.

    I stopped being friends with her about six months after this behavior started, I just couldn't bear with it any more. To the best of my knowledge, and we were pretty close at that time, she had no problems and there were no obvious reasons for her to behave like this, so why she did it is still a mystery to me.

    To mf: Don't delete it, there's no need. I have a friend who got burned like you and now he won't open even a Facebook page, let alone do anything else via Internet which requires any form of private information shearing.

    To SpaceCowgirl: Yep, she actually lied and telling those things like they happened to her. And those were like so much little things, like you have some personal memories and unique experiences, something that involved member of your family or lets say something that happened with your boyfriend. Now if it were one, two or several stories I'd be ok with it (wouldn't mind that much), but that was a hole bunch of things.

    I don't care about it so much anymore since I'm not friends with her anymore, but I wouldn't like to be in such situation again and I guess I'm curious to find out what could lie behind that kind of behavior.
     
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