How do you express your feelings to someone?

[Gaze]

How do you usually express your feelings to someone?


I guess my question is do you need to tell them you like or love them, or how they make you feel in order for the relationship to progress?


Do you need to express those feelings for them to know and understand how you feel?


Are you verbally explicit, or do you express your feelings in other ways (non-sexual) instead of using words?

 

[Nixie]

I would say I express my own feelings poorly. Only in the sense that I won't do it on a regular, spontaneous basis. Generally if someone cares for me, I can tell without all the gushy "I love you" stuff needing to happen. I am happier with someone who can appreciate that when I do express emotions or feelings that they find value it that. I think that F types get somewhat immune to the fact, that for some, Feelings aren't that easy to express. I have had some men downplay the expression of emotions as "should be doing this regularly and there's nothing special about doing it" kind of attitude which has made me pull away from them. I value quality over quantity when it comes to expressions of love.

 

[Jonathan]

I feel the same way. I can just tell if someone cares about me and are making the effort to show it. I find it to be somewhat corny to give people half-hearted I love you's out of obligation. Expressions of love like that are special, and I like to use them only in the most passionate circumstances, when they seem appropriate and not redundant. I usually have a hard time expressing how I feel about people because I'm worried that they might not understand exactly what I mean.

If I like someone as a friend, I'll occasionally tell them about certain qualities I like about them, but mostly show that I care by being there for them and also listening to what they have to say and understanding. For family, it's become more difficult to tell them directly how I feel about them, possibly because I'm growing older. I often feel compelled to tell them how much they mean to me, but it just never really feels like the right time. I mostly show my immediate family how much I care by sacrificing things for them, picking up their slack, and giving them advice and guidance. As for a love interest, I'm still waiting for the right person to express that kind of love for. I just hope that when the time comes, I'll have the confidence to tell her how I feel.

 

[Sesquipedalian]

with a shotgun and a cigar

 

[Matariki]

How do you usually express your feelings to someone?

It depends for me, it differs depending on the individual. I am hesitant when it comes to feelings and sharing them but eventually I find the courage within to tell someone how I am feeling. I tend to express my feelings through my actions. I don't generally tell someone until I am absolutely sure.

I guess my question is do you need to tell them you like or love them, or how they make you feel in order for the relationship to progress?

Being hesitant I don't tell anyone how I am feeling about them. I tend to play it out and wait. I don't like rushing into anything without thoughtful thinking and introspecting. I don't need to tell anyone how I am feeling, I show it through my actions.

Do you need to express those feelings for them to know and understand how you feel?

Yes.

Are you verbally explicit, or do you express your feelings in other ways (non-sexual) instead of using words?

I express my feelings through my actions and behavior rather then diving in head first using words.
Its a safer bet and there is nothing lost or any unwanted embarrassment if it doesn't work out. It also allows me to investigate the individual and look for anything such as compatibility and moral aspects etc.

 

[anica]

I use words far too often and actions far too infrequently. It makes me seem insincere.

 

[NeverAmI]

How do you usually express your feelings to someone?

It would seem as though they either don't get relayed or I write a 10 page dialogue explaining them.

I guess my question is do you need to tell them you like or love them, or how they make you feel in order for the relationship to progress?

I think that depends on the relationship, but generally using words and statements that increase the level of devotion and commitment are typical.

Do you need to express those feelings for them to know and understand how you feel?

I typically cater my expressions to the comfort level of the other.

Are you verbally explicit, or do you express your feelings in other ways (non-sexual) instead of using words?

I try to use actions as much or more than words.

 

[invisible]

i try to make them cry all the time by doing the most "thoughtful" things i can think of

they know i've lost interest when i stop trying to make them cry all the time

 

[That Girl]

I have this terrible tendency to give reasons instead of expressing feelings. It's never I feel x when you do y. I can't explain things that way because I need to have the right words for everything, and finding the right words for a feeling is near impossible for me. Instead of including x I just bring up that y is pretty cool.
The word love is not sacred to me. It never has been and it probably never will be. I tell my friends I love them and signing off from instant messaging with "I love youuuuuu" is common for me because it reminds me of that Eddie Izzard skit from Dressed to Kill. The emotional complexities a lot of people correlate with the word 'love' just doesn't click for me. If I tell someone I love it usually means "I suck at expressing emotions and I just want to let you know that I care about you as a friend and I'll be there if you need someone."
It gets serious when I start saying "I promise." It doesn't even matter what I'm promising either. When I tell a friend that I'll do something important I'll say "Yeah, I can do that." or "I'll do it at this time because I have to do this first." If I legitimately have found an inamorato then when they ask me to do something I respond with "I promise I will (fill in blank)." The quintessence of expression for me would be to look someone straight in the eye and say "I love you, I promise." It means I will be truthful and my best for you, forever. I have only said it to one person and I am positive that the only reason I didn't marry that boy was because he left me. He would have had me for the rest of my life.
Deep down I have this urge to verbalize how I'm feeling and, really, it's only because I understand and articulate emotion so poorly. I don't want the other person to find me incapable of emotion, or see me as being cold because I am not either. I just can't comprehend it all. It's obvious that I don't usually follow through on this urge as I'm not too keen on making a fool of myself. I'm much better at concatenating information to explain what or how I think rather than feel.
I do, however, try to show people that I care about them even if my requirements differ from others.

 

[just me]

I think I can write my feelings better than share them, and share them easier than show them. These things take time.....for me.

 

[acd]

In joke form usually.

Sometimes I tell them straight out, but that is rare.

Unless I'm angry. Then I am pretty upfront.

 

[bamf]

In joke form.

^^This^^

Most definitely goes for me as well.

 

[yepunsarang]

Definitely have a need to write in order to express...not that I can't say meaningful things when I'm around them, show affection. But usually when I'm in love, it means that I love them so deeply and knowing the INFJ, in a complex way ^^. So in order to let someone know what they mean to me means showing them how precious they are to the world in their own individual, special light. Love for me is a dangerous thing. That's why I think i've figured out that I've got to be extremely picky hehehe...

Not sure if many people will agree, but I think in general, it's important to be verbally explicit if you want to SHARE love with someone an remain in a healthy relationship. It's easy to get lost in your own head about your relationship and revel in it, freak out about it, alone. But when you do that, I think you get hurt more in the long run and you might botch things up when you see things that don't even exist. By keeping open communication and telling them where you are in the realm of love and seeing what they have to say, let's two people grow together and get stronger.

Verbal means I think are probably my forte (also since I get a bit shy. When I feel vulnerable, I get really shy and self conscious.) But I also love physical affection, so much. I've gone for about two months without really getting to say anything in person about what i'm feeling to someone I love, because I knew when we met we didn't have a lot of time, and that was when I was falling in love. At that point, I felt like words were spaces between us. I didn't want a single word to keep us apart. Physicality was the only way I could express what I was feeling inside...

 

[Bird]

“Words are only painted fire; a look is the fire itself.”

 

[Forest Dweller]

I've found that looking like a dumb**** and staring into someone's eyes after a certain point tells them all they need to now about my feelings. Not that I don't tell them how I feel, etc., but I've found that right at the beginning of relationships, that's the signal I've sent, often unintentionally, that's gotten my message across.

 

[Questingpoet]

Like this....

Once more I'll whisper sentiment
Once more so much to say
But words will only shadows cast
Of my souls bouquet. ~Qp

...or perhaps like this

Come sing our song of joy and laughter
Come dance beneath the stars hereafter
Kiss me now and you will see
Your eyes within the world to me ~Qp


Definitely like this...

I feel your longing tender gaze,
And stir from dreams contented haze.

Questions unspoken, yet gently mentioned.
A touch, a kiss--your loves intention.

The lips that linger on my skin.
The heart that ever lets me in. ~Qp



For me it is much easier in the written word. And still sometimes those may fall short...

 

[Number B]

Well considering woman are better at reading body language.
(And actually knowing when someone likes you).

They should be able to tell by the subtle changes in my behaviour.
If they can't pick up on that because they lack interest or are unable to
"read/analyze" me than they are not worth my time. I do like a woman
who is able to read people like a book .

 

[DoveAlexa]

Forceful but consensual sex.

 

[KorJax]

Awkward and rushed leaving both disappointed by the outcome, so far