Fi and authenticity | INFJ Forum

Fi and authenticity

Discussion in 'Psychology and MBTI' started by Honey, May 24, 2020.

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  1. Honey

    Honey Regular Poster

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    In my daily working life I meet a lot of XXFP types. I rarely find any of them genuine. All the people who I think are deeply fake and hypocritical is usually some sort of Fi type, especially XSFPs. Very often they seem to have values that many other people would consider warped/immoral or downright selfish but many Fi types seem to think that these same values make them "real" or something.

    Would someone explain to me how Fi in MBTI came to be so closely aligned to genuineness and authenticity? I honestly just don't see or get it.
     
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  2. Sandie33

    Sandie33 Love Often & Absolutely ♡
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    From my perspective, Fi types go with what feels good to them when relating with others, while Fe types take into account how the other person will feel before they decide/ or act. This gets even more detailed when they are sensers.

    xxFP's tend to follow strict guidelines of the rights & wrongs of social structure, rather if it feels right to them then it's right for everyone. This isn't the case for everyone and they are perceived as superficial, immoral, and selfish.

    The easiest way for me to remember is
    Fi is self-centered and appears selfish
    Fe is others-focused and appears selfless.
    :)
     
  3. Impact Character

    Impact Character folding paper cranes ⭐

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    Hey :) I'll give it a try!

    As I understand it: Fi means following internally established values. Like all the internal subjective functions it's a complex system, in this case it's a complex system of personal values (which can be everything from selfish to altruistic actually). The idea is to be "in peace with yourself" (inner stability, equanimity (including not making your friends hate you bc you hurt them)), and in order to get there it involves to be authentic, meaning that these internal guides/guidelines are followed (usually after sifting through the complex system), and it results in being genuine because strong Fi types won't do anything that goes against their internal system. Now that being said, people are not perfect and abstract nor concrete system aren't either (even if we wished they were). From outside the decissions Fi comes up to might not be as obvious or understanding.. I would say that sometimes they don't make sense to me (Ti) or when Fi is avoiding to express emotions it's getting unnecessarily difficult, just like how what works for me personally won't necessarily feel right for a Fi, especially when what works for you personally is oriented toward the values of a group, their feelings, the "tribal development" and keeping collective peace rather than internal peace.

    So this is my attempt to explain. Hope that makes sense to you. (Talking about the idea behind the concept.)


    sidenote I: Fi-Si needs to make a decission and do something before knowing what the "feeling value" is as a result. That's why many INFPs seem to jump to another path/decission after having tried it on, and that looks from >the outside< like something random and not a system or so, kinda "jumpy" if you know what I try to say. Fi takes time to sift through these things.. while Fe is more in the moment (when Fe takes time it actually goes into Ti.)

    sidenote II: Everyone has values (and all 8 functions), but since only half is conscious and the other half is unconscious the Fe type with unconscious personal values might have learned about them but is not taking the box out of the dark to open it and sift through Fi values when a decission comes up. Personal values will be for Fe more of an unconscious thing in the background (that Fi users will see right away btw and therefore believe Fe is "fake" and shifting).
     
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    #3 Impact Character, May 24, 2020
    Last edited: May 24, 2020
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  4. acd

    acd jezi baba

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    What a fun thread!
    Basically you are correct. Fi types are terrible, awful, selfish people. And Fe types are moral and selfless. Hope that helps!
     
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  5. SpecialEdition

    SpecialEdition THANKS RUG

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    But are they GENUINELY and AUTHENTICALLY terrible, awful, selfish people?
     
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  6. acd

    acd jezi baba

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    Exactly. Truly, genuinely, awful, selfish people. Now everyone can congratulate themselves for being correct and better human beings with a nice circle jerk.
     
    #6 acd, May 24, 2020
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  7. Milktoast Bandit

    Milktoast Bandit Dominate with compassion...

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  8. Milktoast Bandit

    Milktoast Bandit Dominate with compassion...

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    Pervert.

    I just used two schticks that are not mine! Yay!
     
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  9. slant

    slant Ruby Adoraboobie

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    That's really weird because as a fi user I find some (not all fe users, see how I don't generalize there? Fascinating) very very inauthentic.

    And the reason for that is that they'll do things that they don't personally want to do or agree with in the belief that it's "for the better good". They will also fail to speak up against an idea if it's popular with most people because "everyone else agrees". My infj friend frequently has told me weird stories that involve him sacrificing himself for others where he ultimately ends up miserable and unhappy and so does the person he thought he was pleasing.

    But I honestly don't think that has much to do with fe I think he just needs to learn better boundaries.

    In conclusion, I don't think fe or fi makes someone inherently selfish or selfless we just execute decisions differently and value different things and therefore will perceive each other differently. Which makes sense. Because we're different.
     
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  10. acd

    acd jezi baba

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    I wouldn't even bother to give a serious answer in this thread. It's a vent thread. It's just here for OP to bitch about people in her life she's probably mistyped anyway.
     
    #10 acd, May 24, 2020
    Last edited: May 24, 2020
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  11. Aneirin

    Aneirin AKA, David
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    and I dont understand much of it anyway. . just be a decent person. .and if someone is a jerk, they're just a jerk regardless of tyoe
     
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  12. Chickensoup

    Chickensoup Community Member

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    I agree it sounds like a personal rant. I’ve definitely accused Fi users of selfishness, but I know they also consider other people. Also, for myself, my feelings matter, so I get wanting to make sure they get taken into account.

    There’s no right or wrong because everyone benefits / suffers when they do things they don’t feel like doing outside of their comfort zone. And similarly, when they stay in their comfort zone.

    INFJs get accused of being ultimately selfish because consciously, we’re Fe and consider other people’s feelings. But, we still have Fi and unconsciously, we do things that please ourselves anyway. It’s also why I sometimes find Fi users to be exceptionally kind, because subconsciously they are considering everyone else.

    Myself, internally I’ve been trying to change some things as an Fe user. What I ultimately want to do is not lose people who are close to me in my life. But, sometimes I have to be selfish, accept that there’s a conflict I can’t fix and back off from it and the people in it, without leaving the relationship.
     
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  13. noisebloom

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    I'll bite.

    If I had to guess, they come off as inauthentic because you don't know them well. Fi is very individualistic, but Aux Fis are much more likely to extravert this individualistic nature than Dom Fis. Having been very close to many INFPs in my life, I would say they are one of the most genuine and authentic types I have known, as they don't compromise their beliefs for anything.

    Fe, on the other hand, is more concerned with maintaining harmony and pleasing others, so while it's a useful and venerable tendency, I would argue that it's less "authentic".
     
  14. Wyote

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    You should listen to @slant and @noisebloom

    Also, my dad is infp and he's an actual genius and generally a badass. He just does whatever the hell he wants, learns whatever he wants.
    I am a potato crowd follower because I like helping for some dumb reason.
     
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  15. noisebloom

    noisebloom theory conspirer
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  16. slant

    slant Ruby Adoraboobie

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    That goes in the out of context quote thread buddy

    PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER
     
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  17. Wyote

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  18. noisebloom

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  19. ruji

    ruji Well-known member

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  20. Ren

    Ren Pin's android / The Maker

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    This is a very apt and precise description of the stereotype about Fi
     
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