Dream/Nightmare help request

[BrokenDaniel]

Last night i had this dream that made a huge impact on me, and that i'm still processing. I thought about sharing it with you guys, mainly because it's rare to have such a vivid dream (at least for me) although through my life i did had a few dreams that in many subtle ways have marked my identity and perception of the world somehow. I have been going through some intense experiences regarding maturity irl, and i've been feeling quite exalted and emotional the last weeks, so i guess it's connected to it somehow.
There was a thread were you could share your dreams, but i couldn't seem to find it anywhere so i decided to make a thread instead, i'd rather keep it this way at this point, mostly because of the lenght.





Disclaimer: Some parts of the story may seem violent and i apologize if i sound a bit... graphic to some.
Disclaimer#2: I make a lot of conjectures like, maybe, i guess, and things among those lines. That's because some parts of the dream are somewhat blurry, so i took the liberty to make some conjectures, however, the most vivid images and situations are all kept there. I mainly did that to make sense of the story since my memory fails at some details, as usual with dreams generally anyway.

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The dream starts with me working at some random/blurry place, i know it was related to my past work experience, because there were some friends and ex-coworkers everything seemed to have a peaceful feel to it.
Then by some unknown/forgotten reason i get locked into an insane's asylum, or what seems to be one. I don't remember going alone, there was an old friend who got there too, but then again, the reason remains unknown. Then, we got involved with these two, i presume doctors, female and male who seemed to have a special brother/sister kind of bond (i know it doesn't seem important, but at the end it is). Don't remember much the place, except it was located near the shore/beach/ocean, and also i remember my room, which seemed to be empty, with the exception of a bed. We were treated like pigs, i remember being physically and verbally abused by these two figures specially, which seemed to be in charge of the place. There seemed to be a revolt inside the place, were the patients rebelled against the doctors, maybe because of the treatment we received, i was involved in that with my friend, we didn't intended to escape, we just wanted to get right back at these doctors. Then, something happens with the female one, something bad, really bad, don't know if she was killed, and i don't recall doing anything to her directly, but something quite ugly went down there with the patients/prisioners, and she was badly injured, damaged, if not killed as i previously said.
Then everything shifts to a feeling of being alone, and defeated/subjugated to this guy who wanted to get back at me for what happened to her sister. This guy began a trial against me, "your friend is now in the basement, so you better have some answers, or i will fuck your life up, just like you guys did with my sister". And i started to get tortured by this guy, physically beaten up, use of knifes (i had scars in my stomach) and electrocution (it was an awful similar to electroshock therapy, but not quite the same either). The last one had a huge effect on me, an unbearable headache that felt incredibly real through the dream and a feel of constant awakening and dream within a dream (i had these dreams before).
Then after some time, i recovered some of my overall identity i guess, and as this doctor threatened me again with that electroshock thing, i started to talk about trivial bullshit to try and fool him, i just didn't wanted to get tortured again, and i don't know why, but it worked, he left me in the room, and now i said to myself "time to get out of here", and as i sneaked silently through the dark and empty hallways i woke up, quite surpised and frankly relieved that it was all a dream, although quite concerned of what this could mean.

Any kind of impressions, interpretations are welcomed. Thanks in advance for reading it.

Bye.

 

[Gaze]

Cool, a chance to exercise my Ne!

Interesting dream. Since you said you are going through some changes in your life, in relation to maturity, one interpretation could be that your life before, where everything was peaceful represented a childhood (not necessarily your own childhood) or early experiences in which life was fairly uneventful and consistent. Maybe you were had a life of complacency where your sense of safety and security was based in your family or environment. Things were clear and sure. Then, things started to fall through, your world turned upside down, and you lost that sense of safety and security you once had.

You were then thrown into a situation which overturned your life significantly, backing you into a wall. Essentially, you were thrust into a lion's den with no seeming way out. Rather than being rescued, you were unfortunately forced to face harsh realities, but fought back. This is the significant part of the dream. You didn't wait to be rescued. You took an opportunity presented to you, to escape. Although you were caught again, rather than be a victim, you conned your way out of a seemingly impossible situation using with and smarts. You realized in the thick of it that you had intellectual and psychological resources you could use to fight back. e.g. outsmarting the doctor.

I think this dream shows that either you've grown into someone who is now realizing you can handle new and unexpected situation, especially crises, better than you thought you could, or you are realizing your strengths, talents, and abilities, and learning how to use them as proof of your growing self confidence and independence that you're asserting. This also indicates a need to recognized as a autonomous individual who doesn't need someone to come to the rescue but you who has adequate strengths to get out difficult situations without depending on others.

It maybe a realization that you can take care of yourself, and no longer need anyone to guide or protect you anymore. You're perhaps developing a self confidence that indicates your own belief in yourself, in your ability to handle any situation thrown at you. I think it also indicates unwillingness to simply sit or passively take whatever negatives thrown at you. You may no longer feel powerless or helpless in your life. You feel more capable and confident in how you handle unexpected problems or situations which arise. You will not allow anyone to take away your autonomy.

 

[BrokenDaniel]

Thank You [MENTION=1669]Gist[/MENTION].

Some things you said do really resonate, both internally and externally. Idk if i've been through a hell of a lot of stuff, but it has been a life-long challenge of mine to move to action and change things for the better. In many ways the feeling of subjugation to my own internal states prevails over my own will somehow, it's very easy for me to give up because i'm feeling not capable, and down. Once a very close friend told me, that i'm like this dog, who barks and threathens to anyone who gets near his meal, but he doesn't eat it in the first place, he just stays there. That metaphor really pissed me off at the moment, because it had to do with my own personal problems, my clear inertia and my refusal to take any kind of advice or help, it's ironic how someone can self-destruct to the point of feeling like you're the one shooting yourself in the foot. Always feared that kind of asylum isolation, and i guess i've been actually living that fear for a very long time as dramatic as it may seem, but really it's concerning. Spent many years been really withdrawn, feeling like small and weak. And just the recent couple of years i've been realizing of the posibility of empowering myself more, having more fun, socializing and playing with my band more often... and that maybe i'm not a misfit doomed to loneliness and who knows what else.
Well, i'm just rambling on here, my head is certainly more clear now anyway. So thanks again.