Do you censor yourself?
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Yes. Filtering yourself, basically. Something you might want to say but won't, for whatever reason.
Yes, but it's often too late. Then I feel like a jerk.
But, seriously, I also censor what I expose myself to. For example, I'm not inclined to go to a movie that I know is depressing, even if it's a great one. As an INTP, I just don't want to be overwhelmed by too many feelings at once. I prefer feelings I can take in slowly. This must seem weird to INFJ's.
But, seriously, I also censor what I expose myself to. For example, I'm not inclined to go to a movie that I know is depressing, even if it's a great one. As an INTP, I just don't want to be overwhelmed by too many feelings at once. I prefer feelings I can take in slowly. This must seem weird to INFJ's.
haha, i can relate. knowing when to keep your damn mouth shut is extremely important imo!
On a serious note; yes I do. I don't even have to try to do it. Growing up I was never asked my opinion on things by most people since no one wanted a kid's opinion. Eventually this turned into a habit of me not saying anything about what other people did, dressed, thought, or so on. When you get in the habit of not putting in your input then its easy to not even have to try to censor yourself. You just won't think of things that will offend people. At least not until 5 minutes past whenever its appropriate to even mention it (for example the conversation moving on).
You might wonder why I think opinions about little things matter when it comes to self censorship. Well like I mentioned it does habit form in you. The real damage is not asserting yourself both in an attempt to not hurt their feelings but also your own to avoid backlash. Sometimes its really just avoiding being hurt under the guise of kindness for others. I have a theory about what this ends up doing to you.
It makes it harder for you to reach out to people. Unless you assert yourself (sometimes harsh words, verbal diarrhea, or remarks) you don't get other people to open up. When you can't get people to open up they will obviously be shutting you out thus making it harder to establish deeper ties of friendship. It's always a two way street mind you. Maybe sometimes we feel lonely because no one asks us the questions that demonstrate others actually show interest in us.
That's my take on censorship for the moment. I went down my own narrow avenue with it. There's more to it of course.
...BITCH!
(sorry, can't help the internet Tourettes)
You might wonder why I think opinions about little things matter when it comes to self censorship. Well like I mentioned it does habit form in you. The real damage is not asserting yourself both in an attempt to not hurt their feelings but also your own to avoid backlash. Sometimes its really just avoiding being hurt under the guise of kindness for others. I have a theory about what this ends up doing to you.
It makes it harder for you to reach out to people. Unless you assert yourself (sometimes harsh words, verbal diarrhea, or remarks) you don't get other people to open up. When you can't get people to open up they will obviously be shutting you out thus making it harder to establish deeper ties of friendship. It's always a two way street mind you. Maybe sometimes we feel lonely because no one asks us the questions that demonstrate others actually show interest in us.
That's my take on censorship for the moment. I went down my own narrow avenue with it. There's more to it of course.
...BITCH!
(sorry, can't help the internet Tourettes)
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I do that when I have an opinion, but it wasn't asked for. For instance, if I hear people around me having a conversation and I find it to be absurd, I'm not likely to voice that no matter how much something in me wants to say, "Are you f*ing kidding me?!" It's not my place; I wasn't asked and therefore my input isn't needed.
I'd like to add on to the question. Do you ever feel when you are doing this that you are doing it to an unreasonable extent? What I want to know, basically, is how much choice is involved.
Does your self-imposed self-restraint ever hinder your own will?
Does your self-imposed self-restraint ever hinder your own will?
thought provoking question indeed. no i do not feel i do it to an unreasonable extent. a lot of choice for me, very intentional. usually in either the context that it's superfluous or uncalled for, or that it's just in general more beneficial for the situation & others for me to keep my mouth shut. to quote Res's quote: "I like restraint, so long as it doesn't go too far." - Mae West
id have to say that yes it feels unreasonable, i can't even talk to most people about things that are interesting to me, because next thing i know im wrapped up in a competition or a complete conversation melt down.. thank god for infjF d:
- Nov 12, 2008
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100% of everything I say gets passed through about 5 filters, gets queried, triplicated, filed, reviewed, printed, and then can be said. As such I am a slow methodical thinker, and come across as overly politically correct and polite.
I'm currently in a need of one. D: Where's my Ti? D: (answer : probably tired and dying because of exhaustion)
that being said, usually I filter myself. Quite a lot, whether it's a "hmm, how will they react?", or "what's the possible reaction I'd get?", and "is this appropriate?"
I think I should add the golden rule.
that being said, usually I filter myself. Quite a lot, whether it's a "hmm, how will they react?", or "what's the possible reaction I'd get?", and "is this appropriate?"
I think I should add the golden rule.
This...
But sometimes I really want to get some rude, impolite, crass, politically-damn-incorrect stuff off of my chest and I just store it until it seems like it fits right in a conversation. It usually does....
Sometimes I get the "wtf did you just say?" look but it's all good. I'm used to it..