A lot of dating advice revolve around the idea that guys are the pursuer and girls should be approachable, but not chasing or needy, etc etc. As introverts, do you think these kind of stereotypes or traditional gender roles apply to you? How would you prefer the other person to act during the pursuing stage if you were interested?
Do traditional dating stereotypes apply to you?
- Thread starter soundofemotion
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I do not pursue.
If there appears to be mutual chemistry, intellect, and some similar interests...then something might be felt on my end. But, would only go after someone if A.) I was 110% sure they were single and unattached. B.) If it was glaringly obvious that the guy also liked me (would need something other than light flirting). That is why I started this response with that first sentence. I don't pursue because the people I meet and like VERY RARELY meet both of those simple conditions.
If there appears to be mutual chemistry, intellect, and some similar interests...then something might be felt on my end. But, would only go after someone if A.) I was 110% sure they were single and unattached. B.) If it was glaringly obvious that the guy also liked me (would need something other than light flirting). That is why I started this response with that first sentence. I don't pursue because the people I meet and like VERY RARELY meet both of those simple conditions.
Hmmm... No. Stereotypes do not apply because if I am pursued by the wrong person, I just become uncomfortable or avoidant. If the right person pursues me, he must be patient, persistent, witty, present, reliable, trustworthy, open and opportunistic. Many have tried. Few have succeeded.
I think they apply yes.
Not because I like it that way, but because they're societal standards that have been forced upon me to succeed.
As guy I don't encounter enough girls if I let myself be chased.
On some other parts I'm rather traditional so it fits fine. I love chasing a girl as long as she leaves enough clues.
I'd be (probably pleasantly) surprised if she actively pursues me in early stages.
Not because I like it that way, but because they're societal standards that have been forced upon me to succeed.
As guy I don't encounter enough girls if I let myself be chased.
On some other parts I'm rather traditional so it fits fine. I love chasing a girl as long as she leaves enough clues.
I'd be (probably pleasantly) surprised if she actively pursues me in early stages.
i have never initiated the chase. i had previously worked in a big corporation where i had interaction with lots of people, who tend to find me warm, friendly, helpful, attentive, approachable. i had collected lots of attention from many males from other teams. after a few meetings i would feel more comfortable in their company, and we can chat, laugh, talk about things outside of work but it never turned into anything other than coffee / lunch dates or the occasional bubbly drink. only one really clicked with me on a subconscious level and he was unavailable so i kept some distance, an invisible emotional barrier to protect both himself and myself from any disappointment.