The whole story has started in the spring this year (2014), and is so damn complicated (hhh surprise, surprise, INFJ involved)
We are talking ENTP/INFJ relationship here.
When we first met the INFJ fellow was just getting better after a very serious disease. He wasn’t fully recovered, was fatigued and physically as well as mentally exhausted. Our relationship has developed with a speed of light though, without me putting any pressure (I was utterly understanding of his condition). Rather it was him that found our relationship revitalizing and healing and was going full speed. However he closed down very suddenly and irreversibly. As he was beginning falling for me he realised he wasn’t quite finished with the relationship to his ex wife after two years of divorce. So he was going to give it a go to be sure it was a right decision.
After the break up we stayed in contact and were exchanging mails. Apart from mails we had some spiritual contact, where I felt he was following me and my life (he confirmed that feeling I had). Maybe because he felt responsible, or maybe because we both felt the need to be connected, I don’t know. I was utterly in love with him and was devastated by his sudden retreat. However I accepted it. And furthermore I realised that meeting this man has changed me and my entire life, so it was definitely worth it even though it was hell on earth. So, he sure deed make a huge impression on me and made a serious foot print in my life. When he eventually wrote to me that he is getting back together with his ex wife I have decided to let him go and let him free. I wasn’t going to wait or fight for him. He got to do what he got to do, I understood and accepted it. So I took off and went traveling to the other side of the world. It took time, loads of tears and meditation but I reached my goal and let him and myself free. And after a while I felt like reborn. I was stronger, wiser, and most importantly, I felt whole, happy and fulfilled.
After been away the whole summer I came back home for a couple of weeks before continuing traveling (I took half a year break from work). I wrote to him, as I wanted to check up on him, if he was ok (physically) and happy (with his family life), which I sincerely wished he was. For the record, I couldn’t really get interested or involved with anybody during summer even though I tried (which is not at all typical for me). So he received my mail and quite unexpectedly he suggested we meet up, which was rather odd. So we deed. He told me it didn’t work out with his ex and they split up again. He seemed to be impressed with how I changed, and told me that I was lighting from inside. He was happy to see me, I certainly felt that. We had a long conversation and ended up kissing, and he even expressed some interest in some more intimate activity. Saying good bye he told me he’ll write to me, as I was going for the next adventure next day (going for two months traveling again). But on which terms we were going to meet up next time was an open question.
So a month has past now since our meeting. I came over initial shock, and wrote him 4 letters. Apart from writing me a goodbye sms the day I left, he never replied to any of my letters. I can wait for this guy from now on and for ever, he is worth it. He is the one, I don’t need to think twice, I know. However, I can’t figure out what he wants. I know that he knows that I had sat him free and was ready to meet him on friendship terms, I sincerely believed that he was with his wife and wished him all the happiness in the world. But he hasn’t picked that possibility up, which was very easy thing to do, I was already playing a friend role. And he only had to tell me that even though he isn’t with his wife, he wants to stay on friendship terms that would be enough. However, he deed change the game, BUT now he is gone completely numb and not responding…
I know he will show up at some point and I know he cares for me. But I don’t understand what’s going on. Can you INFJ guys kindly help me to decipher what it all could mean and what should I expect???
PS.
I’m not a native English speaker, so please excuse my spelling or grammar mistakes
We are talking ENTP/INFJ relationship here.
When we first met the INFJ fellow was just getting better after a very serious disease. He wasn’t fully recovered, was fatigued and physically as well as mentally exhausted. Our relationship has developed with a speed of light though, without me putting any pressure (I was utterly understanding of his condition). Rather it was him that found our relationship revitalizing and healing and was going full speed. However he closed down very suddenly and irreversibly. As he was beginning falling for me he realised he wasn’t quite finished with the relationship to his ex wife after two years of divorce. So he was going to give it a go to be sure it was a right decision.
After the break up we stayed in contact and were exchanging mails. Apart from mails we had some spiritual contact, where I felt he was following me and my life (he confirmed that feeling I had). Maybe because he felt responsible, or maybe because we both felt the need to be connected, I don’t know. I was utterly in love with him and was devastated by his sudden retreat. However I accepted it. And furthermore I realised that meeting this man has changed me and my entire life, so it was definitely worth it even though it was hell on earth. So, he sure deed make a huge impression on me and made a serious foot print in my life. When he eventually wrote to me that he is getting back together with his ex wife I have decided to let him go and let him free. I wasn’t going to wait or fight for him. He got to do what he got to do, I understood and accepted it. So I took off and went traveling to the other side of the world. It took time, loads of tears and meditation but I reached my goal and let him and myself free. And after a while I felt like reborn. I was stronger, wiser, and most importantly, I felt whole, happy and fulfilled.
After been away the whole summer I came back home for a couple of weeks before continuing traveling (I took half a year break from work). I wrote to him, as I wanted to check up on him, if he was ok (physically) and happy (with his family life), which I sincerely wished he was. For the record, I couldn’t really get interested or involved with anybody during summer even though I tried (which is not at all typical for me). So he received my mail and quite unexpectedly he suggested we meet up, which was rather odd. So we deed. He told me it didn’t work out with his ex and they split up again. He seemed to be impressed with how I changed, and told me that I was lighting from inside. He was happy to see me, I certainly felt that. We had a long conversation and ended up kissing, and he even expressed some interest in some more intimate activity. Saying good bye he told me he’ll write to me, as I was going for the next adventure next day (going for two months traveling again). But on which terms we were going to meet up next time was an open question.
So a month has past now since our meeting. I came over initial shock, and wrote him 4 letters. Apart from writing me a goodbye sms the day I left, he never replied to any of my letters. I can wait for this guy from now on and for ever, he is worth it. He is the one, I don’t need to think twice, I know. However, I can’t figure out what he wants. I know that he knows that I had sat him free and was ready to meet him on friendship terms, I sincerely believed that he was with his wife and wished him all the happiness in the world. But he hasn’t picked that possibility up, which was very easy thing to do, I was already playing a friend role. And he only had to tell me that even though he isn’t with his wife, he wants to stay on friendship terms that would be enough. However, he deed change the game, BUT now he is gone completely numb and not responding…
I know he will show up at some point and I know he cares for me. But I don’t understand what’s going on. Can you INFJ guys kindly help me to decipher what it all could mean and what should I expect???
PS.
I’m not a native English speaker, so please excuse my spelling or grammar mistakes
.