Best online dating profile for attracting NFs? | INFJ Forum

Best online dating profile for attracting NFs?

Discussion in 'Relationships and Sociology' started by worthy, Mar 4, 2019.

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  1. worthy

    worthy Regular Poster

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    Yes, I know all types CAN be compatible, or so people like to loudly shout when this kind of question comes up.

    Seriously, I would love to know how to offer the secret NF handshake on Bumble, etc. Not just noting my four-letter type, but using the words and phrases that will signal to and attract other NFs.

    I have had a profile up for a couple of years and thought it was pretty good. Authentic. Clever. Interesting. (Same for my photos.) But the lack of response is...curious...and I would love to know if there are some tricks to this especially for INFJs.

    I hated the idea of trying to meet someone online, but the odds are challenging enough on all frontiers that I figure I'd best keep an open mind and use the tools that other people use. Advertising myself in such a superficial way is a challenge. But what else can one do (other than hope to find someone compatible offline, which I am also doing)?

    If there's no magic formula - and I'm sure someone here will say there is none - then what are YOU looking for when thumbing through dating profiles in search of an INFJ-compatible person?

    Help me crack this code! As usual, I feel like everyone else gets it and I'm left in the dark despite my best efforts to emulate what others are doing.
     
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  2. StRoNgO

    StRoNgO Community Member

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    join the club, i honestly think its just our type, its hard for us to conduct ourselves like others do. we seek deep meaningful connections along with the gratification of instant experiences.

    Your at least a female, its always easier for a female to come across some one of interest than it is a male. Heterosexually speaking.
     
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  3. Asa

    Asa Resident palindrome

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    Online dating may suit you, @worthy. Connecting mentally with others first may work well.

    @StRoNgO - I think after a certain age, it is harder for women to meet people than it is for men of the same age. It's also harder for women with kids to meet men.
     
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  4. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Community Member

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    Things I’ve tried:

    I value thoughtfulness, unconventionality and honesty

    Looking for someone to go swing dancing, eat brunch and build forts with

    Looking for someone to test drive Porches with

    I won’t try to fix you
     
  5. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Community Member

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    The first and second one bring all the INFJs to the yard
     
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  6. Pin

    Pin "Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart

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    Keep it short & to the point.
     
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    #6 Pin, Mar 5, 2019
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2019
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  7. Sloe Djinn

    Sloe Djinn Idiot with Internet Access. Puts Tabasco on Pizza.

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    Can you give some vague examples of what you say and what you think is appealing about your profile? Btw if you are uncomfortable with that I totally respect that, as even examples may risk making your profile searchable.
     
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  8. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Community Member

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    I don’t think Pin is a real ENTJ

    Speculative but gut feel
     
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  9. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Community Member

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    You could try being direct and say: Swipe right if you’re ENFP, INFP, etc
     
  10. Wyote

    Wyote Con Risa Absoluta
    Staff Member Administrator

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  11. Cornerstone

    Cornerstone Well-known member

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  12. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Community Member

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  13. Pin

    Pin "Magnificent Bastard" / Ren's Counterpart

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    Online-dating is almost completely appearance driven. Most people don't even read profiles because they're physically, mentally, and morally inferior. You probably won't find cool NFs there.

    Currently Tinder, Bumble, and most dating-apps are a breeding grounds for the degenerate herd, the lemmings, the letzer-mensch.

    Here's what you're going to do: get into great physical shape, great financial shape, and live a great life. Guys who are worth dating don't or barely use dating-apps, let alone date online.

    These guys are busy making moves: starting companies, majoring in STEM, joining the military, police-force, fire-department, and posting here on this forum.
     
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    #13 Pin, Mar 6, 2019
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2019
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  14. True Story

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    Even thou I’ve been single for more than a year and I’ve been pretty heavily using the dating apps the whole time, I’m still a believer lol. And I really wouldn’t generalize why ppl use or don’t use the apps for dating and how they use it. If you are looking for NFs they are most likely read your profile and yea it’s probably the minority of ppl but that is what we are looking for.
    Honestly, if INFJ thinks his/her profile is good, it’s most likely amazing, but it may seem that it attracts wrong ppl just because the other types prevail and of corse they want to contact you.
    Don’t lose hope! I’m sure the person you want to attract will be attracted to what you decide is important to put on (or keep out) your profile.
    Online apps is definelely not the best tool to find someone, not to mention how frustrating it can be, and you doing the right thing by not relying on it entirely. But still, just by numbers of ppl you “meet” as an introvert it does give you better odds to find that person.
     
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  15. neko

    neko zou zou

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    test drive porches, eh?
     
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  16. Elis

    Elis Permanent Fixture

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    I don't think dating apps per-se is a bad thing. It opens up opportunities to meet people in an age where we are more and more secluded from each other in day to day life. I do however think it enacts our more superficial sides, in lack of a better word. Our attention span is only so great, and in a bombardment of new information people will be very selective with their time. Think of it as with commercials or pop ups. I don't remember the exact numbers but you basically have seconds of attention for the average sale page, before people move on, and I imagine -as awful as it sounds- dating apps are very similar. This is what I personally dislike with the idea of dating apps, to make the aspect of meeting people in real life something mundane and game-ified. I don't know how bumble works, but I'm gonna assume it's close enough to how tinder operates. Most people will only look at your bio if your pictures are already peaking their interest. I get that some people are different, but I think that's how we generally work - even the more introspective and thoughtful people. I think it's a mistake to assume that a grouping such as NF types would be that different.

    I've never used them myself, but I'd suggest trying out more traditional dating services if dating apps aren't working out. Well, there are a lot of other things you could try out as well, but it could be worth a try.
     
  17. Scientia

    Scientia A true lady

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    I don’t know that you can attract certain types with a kind of profile but I would be honest about what you want and who you are.

    I was online briefly and I think my profile was downright bitchy but I found an INFP through that site, so don’t be afraid to be you.
     
  18. Hostarius

    Hostarius Apostate INFJ

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    LOL. You are the kind of guy who believes his own satire. I love it.

    :tearsofjoy:
    If people want to do that, I recommend Halloween.
     
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  19. StRoNgO

    StRoNgO Community Member

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    Any Luck to OP?
    Come to texas, i got a pocket full a Frog skins to take you out on a date...….ill take you to the Zoo with a pack of Kools , we can teach the monkeys how to smoke cigarettes!!
     
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  20. ClevelandINTP

    ClevelandINTP Community Member

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    Get these INFJs some dates
     
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