are you insensitive? | INFJ Forum

are you insensitive?

Discussion in 'Psychology and MBTI' started by soulseeker, Feb 20, 2010.

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  1. soulseeker

    soulseeker Permanent Fixture

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    As an INFJ, or maybe me as a person, I am very sensitive
    like super sensitive.. I analyze every action people do

    but then........ in social situations... I don't know why... It's just natural.. I become insensitive

    and I do feel guilty... but I don't know why I appear too blunt and insensitive... maybe I am blunt but not too much as when I'm with strangers

    it's like... I'm unconsciously trying to isolate myself from people

    a while ago, we had a soiree and it was really boring.... I study in an all girls school and so I don't really go out to meet guys.. like purposely.

    and many of my classmates are like this too... the girls and the guys are separated

    and compared to our last soiree, this was really really way too boring

    and......a guy went like please go there.. and I was like.. no one's even there

    and we played truth or dare... and then it's my turn and they asked me who I think was most good looking guy and I told them no one

    uh.... I think it's too insensitive...... oh my.... well I just do that not ONLY to guys... but whenever I meet someone new... it's like there's another me talking to people then when they get to know me more... they see a whole different me.. the true me





    do you do this too? like being insensitive to strangers? or is it just me?
     
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  2. Outside

    Outside Regular Poster

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    Do you actually become insensitive, or do you just shut down your outward expression of sensitivity? Maybe it is the social environment at school that causes you to "shut down."

    I'm sure you will start to, or at least feel more able to, open up as you get out of high school, it really feels like a breath of fresh air. It's hard during this time, you feel great to be opening up your mind while this weird social atmosphere chokes many of the exits for that knowledge and compassion to come out.

    In high school (but I am INFP for the most part...high Fi), I have come off as insensitive at times, or just quiet, but recently I have been opening up to others, especially if they seem down at the moment.
     
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    #2 Outside, Feb 20, 2010
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2010
  3. Lucifer

    Lucifer Registered User #666

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    Maybe you see social situations in a very negative light and it reflects in how you act in them.

    When I see something as bad I act like a bitch toward it. Whether it is bad or not lol.
    :msith:
     
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    #3 Lucifer, Feb 20, 2010
    Last edited: Feb 20, 2010
  4. OP
    soulseeker

    soulseeker Permanent Fixture

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    yeah i think i see it in a negative light....
    i just realized now that i think that's why some people still think that i have strong personality because i do act bitchy in most social situations especially if i don't feel the situation

    i do seem very unapproachable and too blunt

    and maybe that's why people get shocked when they see that im really super sensitive
     
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  5. SpaceCowgirl

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    I used to get this quite a bit in high school. I never noticed until my friends would tell me that many people thought I didn't like them. I think it's just a defense, to appear insensitive as apposed to letting everyone know just how sensitive you are. I always thought I was just coming off as shy because I am, but everyone took it as me being really stuck up and bitchy. If you don't like a situation then that would definitely make it worse.
     
  6. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    i agree with this.
     
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  7. Shai Gar

    Shai Gar Guest

    I'm not insensitive. Only pussy weaklings think I'm insensitive.
     
  8. acd

    acd Well-known member

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    I would call it more, "Social malfunctioning." I'm sensitive to people's needs and feelings.. I'd do most anything within reason to help someone out, lend my ear and give concentrated advice..
    and yet, I always say the wrong thing.

    I ask an intrusive question to an aquaintance because the person is dancing around the subject, the person shuts down communication or changes subject.. and I feel like an utter idiot for my gaffe for days or weeks.. going over how I could have said this or that better..And then I wonder if I've been raised by wolves.

    I'm not really one for subtlety, though. "Say what you mean and mean what you say." Don't ask me a question without asking the question. I do need to learn how to employ more finesse in social situations..
     
    #8 acd, Feb 23, 2010
    Last edited: Feb 23, 2010
  9. NeverAmI

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    Perhaps there is some part of you that feels you are not worthy of social approach. There is definitely a number of inferences in your past that led you to avoid being approachable in social situations.

    Introspection could be good on this one.
     
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  10. rainrise

    rainrise Community Member

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    hmm i think if you broadcasted an INFJs thoughts...it can sound pretty insensitive. i remember arbygil mentioned in another thread that we don't show this...we think it.
     
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  11. Barnabas

    Barnabas Time Lord

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    Insensitive, not always. But when I am, I make a complete ass of myself. I once called friend of mine amidget infront of a little person, I have never been more embarassed or ashamed.
     
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  12. Eric86

    Eric86 Community Member

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    Some people have said I'm insensitive, some say I'm not....it really just depends on if they understand and like how I think. Even if I'm acting in a sensitive manner, if a person doesn't like what I have to say, no matter how clearly and tactfully I say it, I get blocked out and labelled as insensitive, along with many other passive-aggressive tactics. I guess they see that option as an 'easy win' to prove in their minds that they're right and therefore have no problem tossing out what I have to say.
    Posted via Mobile Device
     
  13. Matariki

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    Insensitive on the outside, very sensitive on the inside.

    However, its not often I choose to show my sensitive side to people, I prefer to keep it a secret.
     
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    #13 Matariki, Feb 23, 2010
    Last edited: Feb 23, 2010
  14. Krumplenump

    Krumplenump Community Member

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    I never thought of myself as insensitive but it would appear I can be, especially if I'm not feeling 'in power'.
     
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  15. Azure_Knight

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    I tend to be sensitive, though I can be insentitive if I get worked up.
     
  16. Morgain

    Morgain defective wisdom
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    same for me, I do act like I'm not sensitive and I joke along with all the rest to not show them how sensitive I am so they can't take adventage of me or hurt me deliberately. It is a shield. I like to joke around and I can imagine it can be hurtful to people who don't know I don't mean it, mostly I make sure they know I don't mean it

    when I do get hurt and I feel it is done deliberately or in an uncarrying way, I get very offensive and bitchy and hurtful. I draw my sword and ...

    I think a lot of people don't realise how sensitive and carrying I can be ... it is just, they don't give me the change to pull down the shield
     
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  17. enigma

    enigma Armed and Fabulous!

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    Wow. ^^ This is me, even now sometimes. I get told I am unapproachable or intimidating. I am just very shy, but never come off that way. I have come to accept it to a point. At least, being aware of it, I can control it to some degree, when it matters enough to me to do so.
     
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  18. wee

    wee Newbie

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    I would like to be insensitive to strangers because it's too exhaustive to be allways good to others I don't even know. For example, when I'm in the bus and someone who I don't know try to talk to me, it's rude not to respond so I make some silly conversation and don't feel well afterward. But I constantly do that. I think it's because I feel insecure most of time and can't allow somebody to think bad about me.

    I think you don't have to change, it's good that you are that way. It only shows you have your own opinion and that you are truthfull to yourself. I envy you :)
     

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