[INFJ] - Are these some normal qualities of INFJ's? | INFJ Forum

[INFJ] Are these some normal qualities of INFJ's?

Jenny

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Jul 3, 2012
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1. I hate, hate, hate politics. I can't listen to it, or think about it. It drives me up the wall. Only Colbert and Stewart are exceptions because they make it extremely funny.
2. I hate listening to my parents talk about finances even though we are really well off. I get worried.
3. I'm disgusted by pregnancy and never want children.
4. I feel that I could not satisfy my soul and fulfill my purpose on earth if I did have children.
5. Babies are not cute and their crying makes my skin crawl.
6. I love tragically sad things. They're so beautiful to me.
7. I'm extremely romantic.
8. I like to be isolated out in the woods in nature to write and paint.
9. Large cities are poisonous- I just feel everyone else's feelings and can't deal with all that emotion packed into small areas.
10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends- two to be exact.
11. When I'm close to someone, I feel like they are another half of me- a soulmate.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing)
13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love.
14. I'm very spiritual.
15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering spirituality, films, or beautiful music/poetry.
16. Experience about five dream premonitions a year- like dreaming about my grandfather passing away the night it happened.

So are these pretty typical for a strong INFJ? Just a few things... maybe I'll think of more?
For some perspective I'm starting my junior year of college.
I do worry about coming off as soulless because I have a strong distaste for children, when really, I have tons of empathy and compassion-that's just focused on my age group, not for babies/toddlers.Their incompetence is off putting (I know they can't help it). Also, I'm an artist.
 
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LOL

Sorry... kind of.

To be honest, no. Those may be normal qualities for your individual person, but it'd be pretty silly to just automatically assume all INFJs are that way. Especially about children, I am pretty sure that is very clearly not an INFJ specific trait.
 
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I think you're better off asking more borad, general questions about your personality. Beleive it or not, not every INFJ is the same.

Especially seeing as all the INFJs I know love kids and some even want them desperately.

Stick around the forum long enough, and amongst the INFJ members you'll notice massive differences between different people of the same type.
 
1. I have a love/hate relationship with politics. I feel it is my responsibility to know what is going on in the world, so I try to enjoy politics. I take breaks from it now and again.
2. I am a parent and my hubby and I talk finances frequently. It doesn't mean there is anything to worry about. It means we are being responsible adults.
3. I was never able to maintain a pregnancy but I desperately wanted children. I now have children through my marriage and I am blessed by that.
4. Children add something to your life. It requires a certain selflessness to be a good parent.
5. Babies are beautiful. If you look into their eyes, you see purity and innocence and joy. It's heart warming. They are crying because they are full of life and energy. That is a good thing.
6. I also love tragically sad things, because of the powerful emotions involved.
7. I'm also extremely romantic.
8. I like to be isolated out in nature to run and write.
9. I love big cities. They are full of character. I learned how to build up walls and shield myself from powerful emoters and from the low-level "thrum" of emotional energy when living in the city.
10. I also have a very small circle of friends- I count 5 people near and dear to my heart, though I love many people.
11. This is how I feel about my husband.
12. Yes.
13. Yes.
14. Yes.
15. I don't worry overmuch about other people's perceptions because they are usually wrong about what's going inside my head. We are all complex and deep and mutable at times.
16. Yes, I knew the moment my grandmother died and often know who is calling me without looking at the phone.

As you can see, some same, some similar, and some radically different. You will find this all over the forums and in all of your personal relationships. :) Welcome to the forums!
 
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1. I hate, hate, hate politics. I can't listen to it, or think about it. It drives me up the wall. Only Colbert and Stewart are exceptions because they make it extremely funny. Like palomica...I don't enjoy it, but feel it is my responsibility to know what is going on around me.
2. I hate listening to my parents talk about finances even though we are really well off. I get worried. I don't like hearing anyone openly talking about their finances. I think it is just bad etiquette.
3. I'm disgusted by pregnancy and never want children. I have 2, and even tho for a very long time I did not want to have children ... they are two of the best things that could have ever happened to me.
4. I feel that I could not satisfy my soul and fulfill my purpose on earth if I did have children. Then don't have them, children aren't for everyone.
5. Babies are not cute and their crying makes my skin crawl. No one likes to hear babies cry. If we did we wouldn't try to calm them.
6. I love tragically sad things. They're so beautiful to me. I don't enjoy these thing, but I do enjoy the emotions they evoke. It makes me feel human.
7. I'm extremely romantic. I'm primal.
8. I like to be isolated out in the woods in nature to write and paint. Yes, very much so.
9. Large cities are poisonous- I just feel everyone else's feelings and can't deal with all that emotion packed into small areas. I have anxiety about being in highly congested crowds, not so much the city itself. I find more beauty and calmness in the country.
10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends- two to be exact. That was me about 20 years ago. Things change.
11. When I'm close to someone, I feel like they are another half of me- a soulmate. Soulmate is not a proper word, but I feel "invested" in the relationship.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing) No.
13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love. Yes.
14. I'm very spiritual. I'm not certain I know what this means anymore, b/c I feel I have found my spiritual place in this universe. I'm not searching anymore.
15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering spirituality, films, or beautiful music/poetry. Sure, it's just part of being misunderstood.
16. Experience about five dream premonitions a year- like dreaming about my grandfather passing away the night it happened. Not sure.
 
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Sounds like ESTJ qualities to me.
 
Sounds like ESTJ qualities to me.
tsk. Have mercy for the poor, clueless newbie here.

As for OP : No, I think it's mostly your particular, peculiar special part of yours. You -may- find similarities or overlapping traits within other INFJs, but it's not so much a blueprint as it is a coincidence.
 
1. I hate, hate, hate politics. I can't listen to it, or think about it. It drives me up the wall. Only Colbert and Stewart are exceptions because they make it extremely funny.
2. I hate listening to my parents talk about finances even though we are really well off. I get worried.
3. I'm disgusted by pregnancy and never want children.
4. I feel that I could not satisfy my soul and fulfill my purpose on earth if I did have children.
5. Babies are not cute and their crying makes my skin crawl.
6. I love tragically sad things. They're so beautiful to me.
7. I'm extremely romantic.
8. I like to be isolated out in the woods in nature to write and paint.
9. Large cities are poisonous- I just feel everyone else's feelings and can't deal with all that emotion packed into small areas.
10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends- two to be exact.
11. When I'm close to someone, I feel like they are another half of me- a soulmate.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing)
13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love.
14. I'm very spiritual.
15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering spirituality, films, or beautiful music/poetry.
16. Experience about five dream premonitions a year- like dreaming about my grandfather passing away the night it happened.

So are these pretty typical for a strong INFJ? Just a few things... maybe I'll think of more?
For some perspective I'm starting my junior year of college.
I do worry about coming off as soulless because I have a strong distaste for children, when really, I have tons of empathy and compassion-that's just focused on my age group, not for babies/toddlers.Their incompetence is off putting (I know they can't help it). Also, I'm an artist.


6, 7, 8, 10, 11, 14 15 and maybe 16 are things that would normally be pegged on the INFJ archetype. Unrequited love might be as well. The rest are likely particular to you. Well, I suppsoe we could split hairs with the politics and finances issues. INFJs are known for being bad with managing day-to-day things like finances and being sensitive to political issues (which isn't necessarily the same as being irresponsible or apathetic- more like INFJs care too much and that hinders them). The children/baby issues are particular to you. The same is true of cities- that is really more based on your life experience. I think 12 is also an INFJ thing, but I'm not sure since it isn't mentioned in any descriptions that I remember. Of course, most people like cuddling/kissing I think.
 
1. I am not interested in politics either. Political theory as it relates to sociology then yes. otherwise I am super invested in it as my SJ parents whom I live with and constantly have debates and discussion and cnn or some other news network is on all the time.

2. I do not mind discussing fiances because as a young person, I need to learn about the value of money. Its important to learn said value since, we all are not well off. To become well off you need to know about personal fiances and how to manage them. If you do not teach young people these things, they fall into debt.

3. The thought of having children now is bit much. I am young and still have few years.

4. Children are blessing to some and curse to others. I have always found it best that the people who want children should have them. I have seen few people in my life, who have been a surprise to their parents and not a pleasant one. No children wants to know they were an unwanted mistake because they will carry that around with them for the rest of their lives.

5. Babies are cute and No wants to hear them cry but eventually they stop caring. Everyone feels awkward around children especially if you do not spend a lot time around them.

6. I do not mind tragic ends because it reminds us of our humanity. It makes us compassionate people.

7.I am also romantic and love reading romance novels.

8. Being isolated in nature either its the woods or an island is great for peace of mind and creativity.

9. Large cities are not horrible for me to visit and spend holidays in especially new york for sightseeing. I hate crowds but I enjoy cultural and artistic events in new york. I do not think cities are super sad.

10. I have a small circle of friends.

11. I believe in soul mates and investing in relationships

12. I like human touch especially when upset.

13. I have not had that much experience with love

14. I am spiritual too

15. I can be mistaken for being sad or some other emotion in every day life with or with contemplation sometimes.

16. I guess I have a few premonitions and dreams. I have not counted them.
 
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Years ago I would have wondered about your using "normal qualities of the infj"; not any longer.

I would think two people made the same would be different due to their environments. I think we seek harmony, environment included, around us. How we seek it may bring out different means and results, as we may not see things alike. Talking about Ni and Se is not one of my things, but what a combination.

Even with the same sensing and judging characteristics, each of our minds navigate the maze of understanding our own way. While something @Jenny listed may seem way outside an infj portfolio, the individualities we each possess make almost anything possible to grasp. Grasping something does not make it necessarily wrong.

Politics and religion are almost always avoided by some smart people in conversation. I personally do not hate politics, nor do I love politics; rather, I feel I understand what needs to be done to make things better and cannot figure why others cannot see the same. I give it much study. I think one of the best political moves of the last year or two was Russian Putin stepping in to help out Cypress and Greece, while gaining significant control of their natural resources and involving him further in their infrastructure. I watch this from an experienced man of the world, while the inexperienced watch.

Worry about finances? Don't need to? I think it normal to be overly sensitive and concerned enough to dwell on such things, but be cautious and careful not to see this as worrying.

Babies, pregnancy, and the likes make your skin crawl? That's OK for you, but it seems like a tragically sad thing to me for someone to feel that way(that covers 6, too).

I have been in the woods many times more than most, but never feel alone there for some reason.
Romantic? I love the woods...............and other things, too. ; ) Enough for now.
 
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I'll answer from the perspective of my INFJ/SO :)

1. I hate, hate, hate politics. I can't listen to it, or think about it. It drives me up the wall. Only Colbert and Stewart are exceptions because they make it extremely funny. He is fascinated greatly with politics, and that is putting it lightly.
2. I hate listening to my parents talk about finances even though we are really well off. I get worried. He doesn't like to think about finances. Its not that he's worried, but dealing with taxes and that stuff is not his thing. He is cheap though!
3. I'm disgusted by pregnancy and never want children. He would very much like to have children.
4. I feel that I could not satisfy my soul and fulfill my purpose on earth if I did have children. He would like children but also wonders if having children will hold him back.
5. Babies are not cute and their crying makes my skin crawl. He doesn't find them particularly enticing but he certainly doesn't feel like that.
6. I love tragically sad things. They're so beautiful to me. He likes things that end sad, but I don't think he finds it beautiful, more just realistic and different to end sad.
7. I'm extremely romantic. He is romantic in his head but he finds it awkward to be romantic in actual real life. He is INTJness in this and thinks that the very act of loving is enough.
8. I like to be isolated out in the woods in nature to write and paint. He likes to be isolated to write. He is fond of nature too.
9. Large cities are poisonous- I just feel everyone else's feelings and can't deal with all that emotion packed into small areas. He doesn't really mind either way, its a case-by-case basis. He prefers cities usually because they have more PEOPLE and they contain more cultures.
10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends- two to be exact. He has a very small, inner-circle of friends that he nurtures.
11. When I'm close to someone, I feel like they are another half of me- a soulmate. We have this.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing) I don't know how STRONGLY he desires it, but he does it freely (just not publically).
13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love. He didn't have this. He very rarely developed feelings. He was prone to over-romanticising them though.
14. I'm very spiritual. He is spiritual too, just not religious.
15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering spirituality, films, or beautiful music/poetry. Definitely not him. He puts on a humorous, happy persona publically except on rare occassions.
16. Experience about five dream premonitions a year- like dreaming about my grandfather passing away the night it happened. Very head of him doing this, but he has vivid dreams.

I think the fact that he is a male INFJ will greatly influenced how he acts; he has had a lot of T pressure/influence.
 
1. I hate, hate, hate politics. I can't listen to it, or think about it. It drives me up the wall. Only Colbert and Stewart are exceptions because they make it extremely funny. I think a discomfort with the corruption and greed that drives the political scene (and consequently day-to-day outcomes for regular folks) is not unlikely amongst INFJs because we/they sincerely care about others, and are likely to value justice and integrity. I suspect, however, that the strong hate you feel extends beyond any INFJness and also stems from your own life experiences and psychological hang-ups/concerns (we all have them).

2. I hate listening to my parents talk about finances even though we are really well off. I get worried. How old are you? It is natural to feel concerned about having enough money, particularly if the discussions your parents suggest money may be hard to come by for your family or that this could be a possibility at some point. Not having money can make us feel helpless and lacking in control, which threatens our sense of security. This can be particularly hard on someone who's not yet in the position to make their own way in life and provide for themselves but who must rely on others, or who worries that those close to them are not able to take care of themselves. Depending on the nature of their conversation, your worry may be entirely understandable and not at all type related but an outcome of being human in this world.

3. I'm disgusted by pregnancy and never want children. This is not INFJ-specific.

4. I feel that I could not satisfy my soul and fulfill my purpose on earth if I did have children. This is not INFJ-specific.

5. Babies are not cute and their crying makes my skin crawl. This is not INFJ-specific.

6. I love tragically sad things. They're so beautiful to me. This sounds a little more like INFP, perhaps? In any case, it may be common to some INFJs but I'm not sure it's something most INFJs would identify with as readily or as strongly. Perhaps I am mistaken, though.

7. I'm extremely romantic. Some INFJ, I think.

8. I like to be isolated out in the woods in nature to write and paint. Sounds a bit INFJ and INFP to me. But yes, more common amongst persons of either of these types.

9. Large cities are poisonous- I just feel everyone else's feelings and can't deal with all that emotion packed into small areas. Experiencing large cities as poisonous is your own thing. Picking up other people's emotions and being an emotional sponge is relatively common amongst INFJs. So the two are connected for you, but they are not for all INFJs.

10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends- two to be exact. High-quality, lower-quantity relationships tend to be common among this personality type.

11. When I'm close to someone, I feel like they are another half of me- a soulmate. The high-level of empathy that this would require may be common among this personality type. The idealized sense of romanticism may also be common, but it may also be more likely experienced by younger INFJs or INFPs.

12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing). This is not INFJ-specific.

13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love. I don't think this is type specific. If you mean feeling a high-level of love toward all/most people in the sense of agape love, then perhaps it may be related to some of the caring/empathy traits common to INFJs. If you mean investing a lot in people who don't necessarily respond in kind, then this may be related to other things including a sense of romanticism and, I would think, more so a function of Fi than Fe? Again, INFP idealism? I don't know how accurate this is, though, so please only take it with a grain of salt.

14. I'm very spiritual. Common experience among INFJs.

15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering spirituality, films, or beautiful music/poetry. Likely to be common among INFJs.

16. Experience about five dream premonitions a year- like dreaming about my grandfather passing away the night it happened. Yes, not atypical of INFJs.

I hope this is helpful for you. Fwiw, it's okay to not want children and to not find them adorable.
 
1. I hate politics.
2. I hate talking about finances.
3. I always wanted to experience pregnancy and have children. (I have two)
4. I 'roll' with it.
5. I love babies, and I feel sorry for them when they're crying.
6. I don't love tragically sad things, nor do I think they are beautiful. They do move me, however.
7. I think I'm pretty darn romantic.
8. I like to be isolated in nature to think and take photographs.
9. I quite like the city. I think it's interesting. If I'm in a small room with a lot of people in it then I feel as if I may have some sort of stroke, or something. That is simply too unpleasant. Peoples energy bounces off me and it's overwhelming.
10. I have no social life.
11. I am very intense.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing) too.
13. This is often the case with me.
14. I have my own brand of spirituality that no one could ever 'get', including me.
15. This happens with me as well.
16. This has happened to me several times. I don't discuss it. It's too much.

Bonus: I'm also an artist.
 
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I think you're better off asking more borad, general questions about your personality. Beleive it or not, not every INFJ is the same.

Especially seeing as all the INFJs I know love kids and some even want them desperately.

Stick around the forum long enough, and amongst the INFJ members you'll notice massive differences between different people of the same type.

but we are similair........its not really matter of group decision.........but i suppose u right.....wateva ;]
 
Talk in my sleep and...............eat while iim driving................and what else..............hang with my friends .alot. too uch......maybe
 
1. Not really. It seems that, even when we aren't interested, we still make some effort to be aware or involved, as mentioned before.
2. That seems pretty 'us,' though I don't know if it's a genuine trait of ours. We are stereotypically bad with money, though.
3/4/5. Absolutely not. We're almost exclusively very family-oriented, from what I've read, and are stereotyped as being very affectionate and devoted parents.
6. A lot of us are poetically depressing, so there's a start.
7. If we think we've found 'the one.'
8. We usually like isolation, although I'm not sure if we're a woodland bunch.
9. Disliking coming into contact with other people's emotions is almost the antithesis of being an INFJ.
12. Everyone likes sex except INTJs, it's not that unique.
10-11 and 13-16 seem pretty apt, though 16 is a bit INFP.

Of course, I might not know jack squat about any of this. :)
 
To me, INFJ means in part, an introverted idealism with a desire to express passion with immediacy and importance. All traits are possible in any person, but a desire of emotional connection appears is especially strong if you can be categorized as INFJ.

1. Politics like Republican vs. Democrat is rarely about idealism. It's more an immediate practicality, thus it's boring. Now, I'd bet political science may be interesting, because that's about how people are connected in a society, as a system.
2. Again, an immediate practicality, thus boring.
3. Same. It weirds me out, but not because I see family as bad.
4. Very possible - kids take a LOT of time, time that I don't have for my values.
5. Babies don't provide intellectual satisfaction!
6. Sounds VERY INF*.
7. Makes sense. Emotional connection of a strong sort.
8. Standard introversion.
9. I personally like cities, at least in pleasant areas.
10. Sounds especially typical for INF*s. High selectivity of personal values.
11. My guess is this one is stronger with extroverted judging types (as in Fe or Te)
12. With all people, or just the people you feel close with?
13. Same. I care almost too much about people...
14. Spiritual how?
15. Common for any Ni dominant.
16. I don't think that indicates anything.
 
1.Politics is important to me, I feel invested in my city, county, state and country and care about the future of the people who live here. These guys, Colbert and Stewart make it extremely funny,but definitely are Liberals.
2.Listening to my parents talk about finances gave me a sense of maturity and belonging.
3. I'm awed by pregnancy and Love children. (Some pregnant woman excite me)
4. Raising children is the most fulling thing life can offer
5. Babies are amazing and live in a wholly other world that you can enter if you have the heart and patience.
6. Some things always triger a vehrklempt reaction in me, they are intensely emotional ideas or events. Some of them I can see coming others take me by surprise
7. I'm extremely romantic.
8. I like to be isolated in nature to feel, read and think .
9. Large cities are intense, if I just imagine others negative feelings it can be overwhelming. But I prefer to live with lots of different people as I find it exciting.
10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends.
11. I have to work on being close to my loved ones, but if I do it is real and meaningful.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing), "i don't want fun, i want intensity --- beyond what seems possible"
13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love.
14. I give religious experiences a lot of thought, am eager for them and have trouble adhering to any "religion"
15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering
16. Dreaming is an important source of understanding my feelings and emotions.
 
Your list is weird.....i think.....most of them actually...... according to *MY* research btw
 
1.Politics is important to me, I feel invested in my city, county, state and country and care about the future of the people who live here. These guys, Colbert and Stewart make it extremely funny,but definitely are Liberals.
2.Listening to my parents talk about finances gave me a sense of maturity and belonging.
3. I'm awed by pregnancy and Love children. (Some pregnant woman excite me)
4. Raising children is the most fulling thing life can offer
5. Babies are amazing and live in a wholly other world that you can enter if you have the heart and patience.
6. Some things always triger a vehrklempt reaction in me, they are intensely emotional ideas or events. Some of them I can see coming others take me by surprise
7. I'm extremely romantic.
8. I like to be isolated in nature to feel, read and think .
9. Large cities are intense, if I just imagine others negative feelings it can be overwhelming. But I prefer to live with lots of different people as I find it exciting.
10. I have a very small inner circle of close friends.
11. I have to work on being close to my loved ones, but if I do it is real and meaningful.
12. I strongly desire human touch (cuddling, kissing), "i don't want fun, i want intensity --- beyond what seems possible"
13. I seem to have a lot of unrequited love.
14. I give religious experiences a lot of thought, am eager for them and have trouble adhering to any "religion"
15. Can be mistaken for being sad, when really I'm pondering
16. Dreaming is an important source of understanding my feelings and emotions.
.