What Communication Skills? | INFJ Forum

What Communication Skills?

Pyrrhula

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Apr 12, 2016
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When I was younger, I thought I was good at communicating my feelings. My INFP ex seemed to be terrible at it, which really annoyed me. He would turn silent as I tried to discuss relationship issues with him and asked him questions about how he felt. I could discuss it for hours.

Weirdly, these days I'm more like him. Over the last few years I've found it increasingly difficult to express my emotions. I seem to clam up and have nothing to say. It's almost as if I don't know where to start to explain the complexities going on in my mind, so I say nothing at all. It makes me come across as very cold and insensitive (and I have been told as much recently). I just struggle to find the words.

Maybe this only happens when what I'm feeling is negative and I don't feel ready or able to express that to others? I also wonder if some event/s in my life have triggered this communication paralysis.

Does anyone else suffer with this?
 
Sorry, this is a bit off topic, but do you ever get just a bit sick of people telling you that you're too cold and insensitive, or you're this or that, or you need to be more like something or other? Or do you think that they are entitled to say those sorts of things? I think it is obvious by the way I'm writing about this that I have a perspective on it, but I'm interested - what do you think @Pyrrhula ?
 
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Or do you think that they are entitled to say those sorts of things?

They can say what they like, but if and when they say things like that, they can rightly fuck off.

There was a time when I was told how to feel, or that what I felt was wrong. That time is over and done.

I can’t honestly remember the last time someone did that to me, which is a good thing indeed.


Cheers,
Ian
 
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